Family | Chrystal Evans Hurst

#218 – Calming Angry Kids

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How do you deal with anger from your child, especially when it’s aimed at you? Do you know how to diffuse the situation and get to the root of the problem while also keeping your cool? When our kids are having a rough day, it can be hard not to take their anger or moodiness personally. In response to our children expressing anger or misbehaving, we often lose our temper and unnecessarily escalate the situation. And that response is only natural: After all, when anger is projected towards us, our bodies go into “fight or flight” mode and adrenaline rushes through us. But like in so many other areas of life, responding naturally isn’t best. There are healthy, Christlike ways we should respond to angry children (and adults!) which express not merely anger and disappointment but also love. A hallmark of a loving, Christlike interaction with your child is that it won’t leave you or your child feeling like a victim.

My friend Tricia Goyer has authored over seventy books and is a homeschooling mom of ten children (!), seven of whom are adopted. As those numbers would suggest, Tricia has much experience and insight to share on raising children. On this week’s podcast, she reminds us why it is essential to identify and address the heart of an issue when anger arises, and she also shares some specific techniques she has found to be helpful in teaching her kids how to be calm and respectful while expressing their feelings.

Tricia admits that she has not arrived or figured it all out (and I totally get that as a mother of five myself), but I admire her for sharing what she is learning as she is living through it. If you have children, work with children, or interact with children on any level, I strongly encourage you to listen in on our chat. The principles and practical tools that Tricia offers will change your relationships with the children in your life for the better.

Highlights from Today’s Episode:
  • Tips for calming an angry child
  • De-escalating arguments
  • Honoring your child’s feelings
  • Teaching your children to be respectful
  • Prioritizing self-care while raising children
    • Click to Tweet 
    • “You can teach your child how to calm down. – Tricia Goyer
    • “It’s okay to just listen. We do not need to solve every problem at the moment.” – Tricia Goyer
    • “One major core need we all have is the need to be seen.” – Chrystal Hurst
    • “When we let our children know we’re available to talk when they’re ready, it makes a world of difference.” – Tricia Goyer
    • Resources From Today’s Show 
      • Check out Calming Angry Kids by Tricia Goyer
      • Grab Tricia’s Anger Response Log to help you parent your peeps.
      • Listen to more of my chats with Tricia Goyer on Episode #111 Motherhood and the Heart of the Home or Episode #133 Walking out in Faith.
      • Trying to write a book? Join Tricia’s Facebook subscription group, Write That Book
      • Looking for my List of Summer Activities Ideas?  CLICK HERE.
      • Check out Podcast #006 on how to “Plan Your Successful Summer“
      • Other Stuff to Check Out
        • Grab my latest books She’s Still There, Show Up For Your Life,  28 Days of Prayer, or Kingdom Woman!
        • Did you miss Episode 217 with Chalene Johson?! Click here to listen!
        • Get a chance to read my post about My Summer Hair Situation?
        • Interested in supporting the content I create?  Learn about becoming a co-producer!
        • Want to subscribe to the blog and grab a freebie? CLICK HERE
          • Let’s Talk!

          After you’ve listened to the podcast, I’d love to continue the conversation. Be sure and leave a comment!

          1. In the past, what tools have you used to combat anger directed at you, whether from children or adults? Are those tools healthy?
          2. In what ways do you demonstrate to those in your home or circle of friends that you “see” them?
          3. In what ways can you be proactive and deal with anger before it shows up in your children?
            4. Connect with me…

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            How to Listen to The Podcast

            If you’re new to podcasts, think of them like little radio shows that you can listen to at your convenience. They are perfect to listen to and learn from as you workout, fold laundry, wash dishes or conquer the world.

            1. Listen right here on the blog. Click the little play button at the beginning of this post.

            2. Listen on iTunes or Stitcher or Google Play! – Be sure and subscribe so you don’t miss an episode! Also, if you would be so kind as to leave a rating on iTunes and/or write a 2-3 sentence review there or on Stitcher?  Your commentary or rating helps make the podcast more “findable” by others who might not know it exists!

            3. Share today’s show –   Email the link to a friend or share on social media. Just click on the sharing buttons at the bottom of this post!

            You have been so great to join me on the journey here on the blog, I hope you jump right in and do the same on the podcast!

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            Family | Chrystal Evans HurstBy Chrystal Evans Hurst