NOT SO HARMLESS COMMENTS. We're so excited to welcome back the fabulous Hilliary Turnipseed to have a discussion about microaggressions that women, minorities and people of color typically face throughout their life. It's an important topic and one that WE are not experts on, which is why we wanted to invite Hilliary over to shed some light on this! This is a casual chat (with lots of laughs) about a topic we ALL need to be more aware of.

[3:00] So… What Are Microaggressions Exactly?? Hilliary tells us what this means. These are very small behavioral cues that people say or do, UNCONSCIOUSLY, that affect how we behave and feel about ourselves.

[5:00] Examples From Hilliary's Experience. Hilliary shares how she has faced microaggressions from other women of color for being "too white". Competitiveness and putting other women down

[10:40] Seemingly "Harmless" Comments That Are Microaggressions. Things we hear or say everyday to others that actually can affect how others feel. Unconsciously stereotyping others based off of their gender, color of their skin or ethnicity. Some examples below:

• Making a woman be the designated note taker in meetings
• Telling women to "smile more"
• Offhanded comments to moms who also have a fulltime job.
• Age discrimation - the whole "Millennials ruin everything" or "are lazy"

[21:20] How Can We Recognize Microaggressions And What Do We Do? Trust your feelings and don't gaslight yourself. Don't develop a VICTIM mentality.

• Separate the facts from feelings.
• It's not your responsibility to call it out when it's done to you, but if you witness someone experiencing a microaggression, YOU should be an ally and address it.
• Becoming more aware of what YOU are saying to others

[26:00] Microaggressions vs Unconscious Biases. What are the differences between these two and how are they related?

[27:40] Dealing With This In the Workplace & "The Memo". How do you deal with constant microaggressions at work that can impact your mental health and self-esteem?

• Your feelings are valid and you don't need to justify it. Your gift isn't meant to be shared with everyone.
• "We want a seat at the table, but is it the right table?"
• Find common ground, even if you agree to disagree.

[31:18] Some Additional Takeaways From Today. Changing habits that we don't realize that we're doing. It takes time and self awareness. It's ok to make mistakes - be resilient and just keep learning. For people in HR or business owners, while training sessions are great, it's not a one and done fix.

[37:58] Resources for You! Read "The Memo" by Minda Harts and listen to her podcast (#SecureTheSeat). Michelle Obama's podcast to hear a perspective from a black first lady and her own experiences. DIVERSIFY your sources and read things from the perspective of those who are affected.

Where you can find Hilliary: https://www.hillstreetstrategies.com/ or find her on Instagram @hilliaryt

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Baklava,

Nat & Nina