It can be commonplace for parents to dismiss their children's feelings because they've been there, done that. Yet our children, too, need to be seen and heard.

Just because you have been through something doesn't make it less important when your child is going through it.

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And honestly, we as parents don't mean to be that way. We have arrived on the other side, so the answer to getting through it seems pretty straightforward.

But to the child in the middle of the situation, it's not as easy as we see it.

How do you escape the trap of been there, done that; and not dismiss your children's feeling accidentally?

The K.I.S.S. ~ See the situation through your child's eyes!

One thing every child longs for is to be seen and heard. If we are quick to push or make less than of an event, circumstance, or situation, that drums up extra drama for the child.

And as you know, that's the last thing we want for our child; extra drama. He/She has enough to deal with not counting parenting mishaps.

Instead of reacting in a commonplace fashion, "been there, done that", see the situation through your child's eyes - It's the A.F.V.!

1. ASK questions. This allows you to sit in his/her shoes for just a moment. Just because you might have been through a similar situation, doesn't mean you know what it's exactly like for your child.
2. FEEL your child's emotions. You need to get in touch with how he/she is experiencing the situation on an emotional level. That doesn't mean you don't try and talk some sense into him/her. But you do want to acknowledge the feelings, because those feelings are real.
3. VALIDATE your child's next step. Give him/her the confidence and courage to take the next step, whatever that is. "One step at a time leads to miles of greatness!" ~ Kristianne Wargo

Mom (& Dad), we need to have compassion for our children and what they are experiencing. Yes, you can definitely have some tough love. But you have to lead your child with unconditional love in order for the tough love to soak in.

So as you build your child's confidence and courage, you too need to show compassion in the process.

"Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"

 

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Read more from Kristianne, a contributor to The Huffington Post, MindBodyGreen, Thrive Global, Addicted2Succes, and She Owns It.

https://addicted2success.com/success-advice/5-things-to-do-while-waiting-for-success-to-manifest-in-your-life/

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/kristianne-wargo/

http://bit.ly/9amHabits

https://journal.thriveglobal.com/how-to-configure-a-sleep-pattern-fit-for-you-d8edd3387eaf#.sniv275c3

https://sheownsit.com/when-failure-is-your-middle-name/

 

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Cover Art by Jenny Hamson

 

Music by Mandisa - Overcomer

http://www.mandisaofficial.com

Song ID: 68209 Song Title: Overcomer Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia Copyright © 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI) 9t One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music -  Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission.