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23. Weaponised Incompetence – Is It Ruining Your Relationship? | REDDIT STORIES
Have you ever felt like your partner conveniently doesn’t know how to do basic household tasks? Does your significant other suddenly become “bad” at something so you’ll just do it for them? This is weaponized incompetence—and it’s a massive conversation in relationships right now.
In today’s episode, we break down:
✅ What weaponized incompetence actually is (and what it isn’t)
✅ Why it tends to show up in relationships (and why men are called out for it most)
✅ How to tell the difference between genuine struggles vs. strategic helplessness
✅ Real-life stories from Reddit & our listeners that expose both sides of the issue
✅ How to communicate about unfair workloads without starting World War III
And don’t miss our new listener shoutouts
⏳ Timestamps:
- 0:00 – The lost remote drama: Who’s really to blame?
- 3:23 – Listener story: “My ex admitted to doing chores badly on purpose”
- 9:09 – Story 1: “My girlfriend keeps accusing me of weaponized incompetence... but I’m genuinely just bad at things”
- 17:20 – Why forgetting the remote again might be hurting your relationship more than you think
- 25:47 – Story 2: “My boyfriend acts helpless about everything… or does he?”
- 34:45 – The real difference between incompetence & lack of confidence
- 41:25 – Story 3: “My girlfriend refuses to do chores… should she pay rent instead?”
- 46:05 – How to approach these conversations without creating resentment
Key Takeaways:
- Not every mistake = weaponized incompetence – But patterns matter.
- If your partner repeatedly “can’t” do something, ask why – Is it genuine or strategic?
- Communication & shared values matter – Unspoken expectations breed resentment.
- Both sides need to step up – Either by learning or letting go of control.
🛑 DON’T FORGET TO SUBSCRIBE & LEAVE A REVIEW! Your support helps us keep these convos going
📥 Free Resources to Go Deeper:
📄 Download our free guide: [The Balanced Partnership Guide]
❤️ Support us on Patreon: www.patreon.com/honeyweneedtochat
📩 Submit a Story: [Share Your Relationship Struggles]
💬 Join the Conversation: Have a breakthrough moment from this episode? DM us, tag us, or share your thoughts!
🔗Listen now: Anywhere you find your podcasts!
📺Watch on YouTube: Here
🌍Join the community & share your story: https://honeyweneedtochat.com/
View all episodes
By Honey, We Need to ChatHave you ever felt like your partner conveniently doesn’t know how to do basic household tasks? Does your significant other suddenly become “bad” at something so you’ll just do it for them? This is weaponized incompetence—and it’s a massive conversation in relationships right now.
In today’s episode, we break down:
✅ What weaponized incompetence actually is (and what it isn’t)
✅ Why it tends to show up in relationships (and why men are called out for it most)
✅ How to tell the difference between genuine struggles vs. strategic helplessness
✅ Real-life stories from Reddit & our listeners that expose both sides of the issue
✅ How to communicate about unfair workloads without starting World War III
And don’t miss our new listener shoutouts
⏳ Timestamps:
- 0:00 – The lost remote drama: Who’s really to blame?
- 3:23 – Listener story: “My ex admitted to doing chores badly on purpose”
- 9:09 – Story 1: “My girlfriend keeps accusing me of weaponized incompetence... but I’m genuinely just bad at things”
- 17:20 – Why forgetting the remote again might be hurting your relationship more than you think
- 25:47 – Story 2: “My boyfriend acts helpless about everything… or does he?”
- 34:45 – The real difference between incompetence & lack of confidence
- 41:25 – Story 3: “My girlfriend refuses to do chores… should she pay rent instead?”
- 46:05 – How to approach these conversations without creating resentment
Key Takeaways:
- Not every mistake = weaponized incompetence – But patterns matter.
- If your partner repeatedly “can’t” do something, ask why – Is it genuine or strategic?
- Communication & shared values matter – Unspoken expectations breed resentment.
- Both sides need to step up – Either by learning or letting go of control.
🛑 DON’T FORGET TO SUBSCRIBE & LEAVE A REVIEW! Your support helps us keep these convos going
📥 Free Resources to Go Deeper:
📄 Download our free guide: [The Balanced Partnership Guide]
❤️ Support us on Patreon: www.patreon.com/honeyweneedtochat
📩 Submit a Story: [Share Your Relationship Struggles]
💬 Join the Conversation: Have a breakthrough moment from this episode? DM us, tag us, or share your thoughts!
🔗Listen now: Anywhere you find your podcasts!
📺Watch on YouTube: Here
🌍Join the community & share your story: https://honeyweneedtochat.com/