Today’s convo is an extract from Virtually Possible 2.0 with the brilliant Marissa Agrasut (Singapore) and Joeri Schilders. Marissa walks us through an online spin on the classic Fishbowl format to sharpen listening, observation, and the craft of facilitation—then we demo it live.

What’s inside

• Why I left the livestream mostly unedited (and why you might, too)
• Fishbowl, but online: how we split “speakers” and “observers”
• The note-taking sheet that forces real listening (points + evidence)
• Five chewy facilitation questions we explored (value, ethics, labels)
• Subtle signals: metaphors, hand movement, eye line, nodding—what they reveal
• Design tweaks that instantly improve the exercise (camera off for observers, brief breathing reset, energizers)
• When to swap roles vs. when to share insights mid-way
• The “destabilising” question trap (looking at you, “What’s your Why?”) and why ethics matter in facilitation

Quick takeaways you can steal

• Make it binary. Half the group speaks, half just listens and writes evidence for each point they heard. Then swap.
• Observers off-cam, mics muted. It heightens contrast and reduces performative nodding/facial feedback.
• Prime attention. Start with 30 seconds of quiet breathing. You’ll feel the room settle—even online.
• Give a success example early. After Round 1, ask observers for 1–2 insightful reflections so Round 2 knows the bar.
• Track evidence, not vibes. “What I heard + what made me think that” = better post-discussion synthesis.
• Mind your prompts. Big existential questions (e.g., “What’s your purpose?”) can be destabilising for cold groups. Use with care.
• Ethics belong in our kit. We influence rooms. Having a simple “do no harm / informed consent / psychological safety” lens matters.

Run-of-show (how to try this in your next virtual session)

1. Frame (1 min): Explain Fishbowl + “why listening, why now.”
2. Prime (30 sec): Cameras on, eyes closed, 3 deep breaths.
3. Split (30 sec): Speakers vs. Observers (use a playful rule: shortest hair speaks first, etc.).
4. Round 1 (6–8 min): Speakers discuss Q1–Q2. Observers capture Points + Evidence.
5. Micro-debrief (3 min): 1–2 observers share insights (not opinions). Facilitator models depth.
6. Round 2 (6–8 min): Swap roles with Q3–Q4.
7. Synthesis (5 min): Group themes, tensions, decisions.
8. Close (2 min): “What changes in how you’ll listen next week?”

Great question prompts (steal these)

• How do you currently describe what you do—and when does that change?
• What value do you actually bring (in client words, not yours)?
• Is facilitation a specialist skill—or a shared capability?
• Should facilitators follow a simple ethical code? What’s in it?
• What one shift would improve our professional practice this quarter?

Energizer ideas to tune attention

• Sound slate: Play 8–12 short audio clips (tools, nature, speeches). Ask listeners to recall as many as possible—no notes.
• Quote ID: Ten legendary lines (MLK, movie monologues, famous talks). “Who said this?”—pure listening, zero slides.

Try it + tell me

If you experiment with this online Fishbowl, I’d love to hear what you changed and what surprised you. DM me your run-sheet or a photo of your “Points + Evidence” page.

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