Dog duty, punks, mandles, blizzard, Amber, Jon's gig, Modern Elixir, Karaoke Versions, knots, massage, Scott has an embarrassing moment, TP visit, poopy equals stinky, faggot school, Safe Haven, Argo, Seven Psychopaths, seven things that make your co-workers hate you, dude - don't touch me, Opie and Anthony, Kristen Stewart, Heisenberg's uncertainty, Pope linked to gay black male scandal, Cardinal Keith O'Brian, sequester, John Boehner, and Phil McCracken Whitcomb delivers the news.