Are you an asker or a guesser? In 2015 while I was deep in hermit mode writing Pivot while living in a tiny studio apartment in Nolita (North of Little Italy), a friend texted: “Hey, do you mind if I crash on your couch tomorrow night?”

To this day, I still feel somewhat bad about my answer . . . but every bone in my body was saying, “Yes, I mind.” I said no. Years later, I still wonder: Should I have rolled with the punches, accepted the spontaneous company, and just said yes?

Today I’m sharing a framework that changed my life when I first read about it in Jocelyn Glei’s book, Unsubscribe—the difference between ask culture vs. guess culture. Or, as I like to think about it, spaghetti throwers vs. spaghetti twirlers. Which one are you?

🌟3 Key Takeaways:

✅Next Action: Establish your own rule of thumb for asking and giving in your relationships. Do you want to wait for 10 touchpoints before making a request like Alex Rodriguez? A year of time like Dorie Clark? Find something that feels joyful and in integrity to you.

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