MBT EN – Understanding Mentalization-Based Treatment

#3: Session 2 > MBT Problems with mentalizing


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🎙️ Episode 3 – Session 2: Problems with Mentalizing

Welcome back.
In the previous session, we explored what mentalizing is.
Today, we take the next step: understanding what happens when mentalizing breaks down.

Because the truth is — everyone loses the ability to mentalize at times, especially under stress.


📌 What this session is about

  • Problems with mentalizing occur when you become too certain about your own thoughts or someone else’s intentions.

  • You may fall into black-and-white thinking, lose curiosity, or stop reflecting.

  • Instead of understanding, you start reacting automatically.

  • These moments often happen when emotions become intense and overwhelming.

🔎 Real-life examples

  • You assume: “They ignored me on purpose” — without checking what really happened.

  • You feel hurt or angry and react immediately, without thinking about other possible explanations.

  • You explain everything from outside factors, instead of looking at your own feelings or reactions.

📚 Why it matters

When mentalizing stops, misunderstandings increase.
You may feel not seen, rejected, or confused — and others may feel the same about you.

Strong emotions can take over, leading to impulsive reactions, conflict, or withdrawal.

This is often the moment where relationships become strained.


✨ How MBT works with this

In MBT, you learn to recognize your “switch point” — the moment where you stop thinking and start reacting.

You begin to notice:

  • When your thinking becomes rigid

  • When your emotions take control

  • When curiosity disappears

The goal is not to avoid these moments, but to recognize them earlier and regain your ability to reflect.


💡 Practice from Session 2

This week, pay attention to moments when you react automatically.
Choose one situation and write down:
1️⃣ What you were thinking
2️⃣ What you were feeling
3️⃣ What you did

Try to look back at the situation with curiosity instead of judgment.


🌟 Core message

Losing the ability to mentalize is part of being human.

The key is not perfection —
but awareness.

The more you recognize these moments, the more space you create between feeling and reacting.
And in that space, real understanding begins.

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MBT EN – Understanding Mentalization-Based TreatmentBy Jasper Manders