The question of "how do we be a family in a local church?" is bigger than finding a church with a kids program. We're to help our children learn to love all God's people, not just their peers. Meaningful relationships in church—relationships where we're obeying Jesus' command to love one another—are different from a playdate. When we give time to someone who is not like ourselves, our children learn that Jesus' command to "love one another" is more than just being nice to the people you would have played with anyway.