Gentle Power

31. How to negotiate when you were referred by someone in the company


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In this episode, we discuss a common dilemma: how to negotiate when the job opportunity came through a referral. Many people hesitate to negotiate in these situations out of fear of seeming ungrateful or straining the relationship that helped them get in the door. We share how to approach these conversations without creating awkwardness or risking the relationship.


Our conversation covers:

  • Why a warm intro doesn't mean you can’t advocate for yourself
  • Why keeping a pulse on your market value now will help you negotiate roles later that came through warm intros
  • The mindset of treating referrals as opportunities for both sides, not an obligation that you must fulfill
  • How to communicate tactfully with gratitude, professionalism, and calm
  • Viewing referrals like dating intros (mutual fit still matters)


We also share:

  • Alex’s biggest DJ set yet: opening at one of NYC’s biggest Halloween festivals
  • Recording our podcast and serendipitously hosting a mini-reunion during our 12-hour layover to Korea
  • Alex's real-life story where the “backup company” became the dream offer


For more:

Book free consultation call with Alex: Calendly

Get our free negotiation worksheet: YourNegotiations.com

Read our weekly newsletter: Newsletter

Instagram: @yournegotiations

LinkedIn: Gerta | Alex



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Gentle PowerBy Gerta and Alex at YourNegotiations.com