It’s Monday, and we’re back after a week off with an extra-long episode of Podtrificus Totalus, a Harry Potter podcast done book by book, chapter by chapter.

On this week’s episode, we cover chapter twelve of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, “The Patronus!” In this chapter, Harry begins his anti-Dementor lessons with Professor Lupin, but he hesitates when he realizes that blocking out the Dementors might block him out from ever hearing his parents’ voices again. Harry and Ron’s feud with Hermione over the Firebolt continues, and just when they’re about to make up, Ron finds a crime scene in his bedsheets with no sign of Scabbers.

We make a number of references to outside sources and popular culture, which are listed below:

Misery, The Eyes of the Dragon, Carrie, It, and The Stand by Stephen King

House of Leaves by Mark Z. Danielewski

The Road by Cormac McCarthy and the 2009 film adaptation

The “Misery Business” episode of Punch Up the Jam

1Q84 by Haruki Murakami

Teen Titans

Ultimate Unofficial Guide to the Mysteries of Harry Potter by Galadriel Waters (Ed. Astre Mithrandir; Published by Wizarding World Press in 2003)

Second Act (2018)

Patronus on the Harry Potter Lexicon

The Patronus Charm on the Harry Potter Wiki

Blue Peter Interview with J.K. Rowling (20 July 2007)

“Expecto Patronum” by Totally Knuts

AOL Live Interview with J.K. Rowling (19 October 2000)

Bloodborne (2015)

The Hurling Hex on the Harry Potter Lexicon

The Math Lady meme

Odd’s bodkins on The Free Dictionary

Our Spell of the Week this week is — you guessed it — Expecto Patronum, Harry’s second favorite spell!

You can hear more from our guest, TK Lawrence, by following them on Twitter and Instagram. Be sure to also check out their incredible wizard rock over on Bandcamp and support them on Patreon!