Your parents have left you alone for the first time ever. You regain lucidity after a week-long bender of pizza and late night shows, only to decide to take the boat out and do some time travel. Will you be menaced by a pistol-wielding dwarf? Will you find out what kind of murder charge applies to accidentally drowning your best friend and your dog? Will you get really hyped for a plot line that ends up consisting entirely of missing a phone call from a DJ? Only one way to find out.

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