Greetings Earthlings.

(At least, the dozen or so who read this and several who’ll listen. Greetings and salutations, indeed.)

Today we learn facts. Facts that we may not have wanted to learn but, upon further review, remain entirely unimportant and likely counterproductive to civilized society.

Nonetheless, today we learn facts.

1. There are Mormon porn sites, for boys and girls, and the storylines are like comedy erotica. “Comederotica”

2. Lenny Kravitz’s average-sized dick fell out in Stockholm.

3. There is a Body Modification Ezine, and one guy used poultry scissors to pierce his above-average-sized penis.

4. The motto of Pure Romance, which is a sex party company, is: Empower. Educate. Entertain.

5. Greg has a tenuous relationship with politically right-leaning libertarians and tea party die-hards.

6. Greg can harsh the fuck out of a good mellow.

7. Apparently, the “apparently kid” can still give us great joy and “prrnt-lee” save the day.

Today’s musical entertainment brought to you by: Lenny Kravitz, with “Fly Away.” Erykah Badu, with “Woo.” And again, R.J. Heid with, “I Can Read Your Mind.”

We present to you, “Today We Learn Facts.”

-G