This week we return to the 1996 "Bachelor Book" magazine. Robert is killing it in "the biz," and looking for a woman who enjoys perfectly average men. Watch out for Robin. Turns out he's super sketchy.

Tinder Profile Poetry by Marissa Alexa McCool - I remembered the link!

Rock Me Sexy Jesus

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Thanks a million to our friend Natalie Boh for her awesome theme music.

Thanks to Rich Lyons for his excellent editing.