It seems as though the Satanic Panic will never end... Much like the McMartin Preschool Trials! In 1983, a woman accused her son's preschool teacher of sexually abusing her child. But she also claimed that the school was sacrificing animals and flushing children down toilets, so obviously Satan must be involved, right?

In America's longest and most expensive trial, seven preschool teachers and administrators were accused of Satanic Ritual Abuse, but not a single one of them ended up getting convicted due to lack of evidence. Shit's cray-cray.