Nursing the System

46: How to make any process less painful (even dating!)


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🎧 Episode Overview:


Yep, we’re talking about dating today. Stick with me.


In this very fun (and surprisingly strategic) episode, I’m walking you through a little experiment my friends and I did this summer: we turned dating into a game. From point systems to profile prep nights to tracking rejection resilience, we gamified the entire experience. And it got me thinking about how any unsavory or tedious process, whether it’s finding love, job searching, or leading change can be made better with intentional systems design.


Gamification isn’t fluff. It’s systems thinking in disguise.


🔑 In this episode, I share:
  • How a brunch gripe session turned into a summer-long social experiment
  • The full breakdown of “The Dating Game” we created (rules, scoring, prizes)
  • The dating app that actually made the process better (shoutout to Breeze)
  • Why rewarding effort—not just outcomes—can shift motivation dramatically
  • How you can use gamification in your work life (for yourself or your team)


🧠 Big Takeaways:
  • Most systems (like work or dating) only reward outcomes—but we stay more engaged when we also reward effort.
  • Feedback loops and visible progress are key to staying motivated.
  • You don’t need to wait for something to feel fun—sometimes you have to design it to be fun.
  • Whether it’s patient recovery, conflict resolution, or giving feedback, gamification can help you and your team keep showing up.


✨ Reflection Questions:
  • Where in your life or leadership could you use a little more motivation?
  • How could you make your effort feel visible and fun—even in serious or boring areas?
  • What “point-worthy” actions would move you toward a goal you're working on?

📲 Stay Connected:
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  • Join the System Sunday email list for weekly reflections and behind-the-scenes updates
  • Follow me on Instagram for more real-life systems thinking in action
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Nursing the SystemBy Claire Phillips, DNP RN