Garth Heckman

The David Alliance

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When people are asked… if you could do it over again would you… and they say “no, I love my mistakes and its what made me who I am today”. That sounds great right, even manly… but I truly doubt it. If I could go back and do things differently would I? ABSOLUTELY 100% - so what would I do differently? Thats where were going today! 

It's impossible to provide a definitive "five biggest mistakes" for every man in every decade of his life, as experiences and priorities vary greatly. However, based on common life challenges, regrets, and advice, here are some generally observed mistakes men often make at different ages:

Under 20:

I would imagine most boys are not realizing that High School is the last free education you will get… use it up as much as you can. And more than that, learn skills from other men, its free education. Welding, automotive, investing, carpentry, cooking, baking, relationship advice, boxing, Balancing your checking account, talking to women, handling conflict… Just about anybody can teach you something for free. 

Here is a lesson I learned early on in life. And I will admit, that early on in life I liked to spend money on stupid stuff… or at least over spend on my hobbies. But I learned two huge pieces of advice. One give yourself a raise every year…i.e. shop for lower insurance, cable, internet, cheaper place to buy groceries etc…

2ndly I sell stuff I have not used for a year and I invest it into my 401k. Also I don’t do my own investing other then crypto. And I do not touch my investments… early on I did, but I learned the hardware. If I had kept my Amazon stock I would have a few million dollars still in my portfolio. 

Not just ignoring health - but ignoring healthy habits. Build into your life a regular weekly exercise plan. Healthy eating and sleep habits. Look I get it, when I was under 20 years old I drank a 12 pack of Mt. Dew a day and ate a full bag of double stuff Oreos - now I was waterskiing and barefooting all day long so I was burning it off and I was also a competitive powerlifter… but the habit was hard to break even though I was not putting on weight. 

Back to working out… most guys say they don’t have time, but if you get up at 5am you will have time, not only that you will be more energetic during the day but when it comes to sleep you won’t be able to stay up late watching stupid TV or computer or phone… so it all balances out. 

Know your weaknesses and box them in, and know your strengths and double down on those. I am not going to spend time working on becoming more detailed and OCD… it aint’ me. I will work on being a leader, communicator, preacher, teacher, vision caster, motivator and risk taker. 

I won’t allow myself to work in my weaknesses - I will let others work in those areas…and if I absolutely have to I will first build a detailed system to do it. 

Most men under 40 are only practicing divorce in their relationship habits. You make out, you have sex, you break up and move on. THIS IS THE PERFECT PRACTICE FOR A ruined marriage. Most guys under 20 are 100% motivated in relationships from a selfish foundation. They only give to get, they never learn to give just to give. They never learn to sacrifice in order to create a better version of the women they are dating.