Driven to Drink

50. David Copperfield's Secret: (un)Revealed

Listen Later

Today, ladies and gentlemen, is the one-year anniversary of Driven to Drink.

(one-person golf-clap applause-break)

Precisely one year ago, “A Brussels Sprouts’ Stalk is a Cruel, Cruel, Mistress” was released, and fifty-two episodes later we’ve progressively arrived somewhere much closer to where we’d like to be than where we were even last week. With the equipment and software we have, we can bring you a consistently audible, acoustically leveled, and fairly professionally sounding product. We’ve found our voices, our cadence, and a way to be organized and focused but not so structured that the authenticity and conversational-tone we desire is compromised. Boil it all down to the rock-crystal structure…and we’re happy with what we’ve become and are still becoming. Also, we’re happy and deeply grateful that you’ve decided to journey with us. Thank you.

Now, on with the show!

The Beers:

Jen – Lagunitas Hop Stoopid. No surprises here. When we have relatively little money and don’t want to take chances, we bring home our IPA “go to.” Hell, even when we have more than enough money, we often buy lots and lots of Hop Stoopid.

Greg – Southern Tier Mokah (22oz.), then Wigle Walkabout 4-grain whiskey brought to proof with apple cider, then Larceny. You can imagine how slurry Greg becomes, and you might still underestimate.

The topics:

  1. Last night, Jen had her first Noddy Toddy. I used to call it a TheraToddy, but Jen uttered, “Noddy Toddy,” and it was clear that THIS was the true name. It’s easy people: Make a cup of nighttime TheraFlu as you might normally. Add a tablespoon or two of honey, squeeze in a half lemon, add an ounce or two of whiskey. Here’s the deal, D2Dreeps, if you want to sleep and breathe through your nose and fear you’ll have neither given the state of your head and upper respiratory system, this will give you both. I promise.
  2. Last night, we saw the incomparable Bill Burr. Furthermore, the hilarious Jason Lawhead, Paul Virzi, and Joe Bartnick. Holy shit. Greg’s jaw and abs hurt from the minute Burr opened his mouth to the minute the quartet took a bow. Really, Burr is on our Mt. Rushmore of comics…and you should seriously consider him for yours. He’s got specials on Netflix. Watch them. Billy absolutely eviscerated a heckler who simply wouldn’t quite shouting out the phrase, “Swine Flu!” At first he incorporated her brilliantly. The second time, he laid in a bit further with a clear undercurrent of, “Okay lady, leave it be.” But the third time, he riffed on her for like 5 minutes. And she shut up. He also picked up on a man in the front row wearing a Tom Brady Jersey. (Billy Sizzle Tit’s a Boston Boy, what with his cah in Hahvid Squayuh and clam chowduh, fuh feck’s sake.) The crowd booed. “Okay,” I’m paraphrasing, “I’ll let that one go, but if you boo again I can’t promise what’ll happen.” (Booooo!) And he riffed for 5 minutes on Brady, the Pats, cheating in general, the Steelers not-at-all-squeaky-clean past, all the way back to the original 4 championships. Dude was amazing.
  3. Our collective comedy histories. Who have you seen? Who do you wish you had seen? Who would pay extra money to see?
  4. Jen was vanished by David Copperfield in Vegas and absolutely will take the secret of that illusion to her grave. Jen loves him, and will be buried in said grave with the 8×10 signed headshot of Mr. Copperfield that she received after having been vanished. Indeed, it’s currently hanging on our living room wall. The big wall. It’s the only thing on that wall which all entering the house see first.  Squinting a bit, like, “Hey…is that…uh…David Copperfield?”  Yes.  Yes it is.
  5. David Blaine is an actual wizard, at least according to Jen and Maddy. Talk amongst yourselves.

    6. That’s about it D2Dreeps, except for the music.  “Black Magic Woman/Gypsy Queen” by Santana…off of Abraxas, which has that album cover that offered a young Gregory Del Duca his first erection.  (Explained more in this post: Middle School Erections.  It’s a fun read, and not nearly as risqué as the title would suggest.)

    We present to you, “David Copperfield’s Secret: (un)Revealed.”

     

     


    (Look at that Punim!)

    ...more
    View all episodesView all episodes
    Download on the App Store
    Driven to DrinkBy Driven 2 Drink