Derek Gaunt in an educator and author with 20 years of experience as a hostage negotiator for law enforcement agencies in the Washington DC metro area. In this conversation with Bart Campolo, Derek talks about 'tactical empathy', emotional intelligence, controlling how someone feels about you, building trust, truly listening to someone's story, understanding motivation, looking for hidden messages and meaning, how to respect the person even if you don't respect their decisions or actions, and how to focus on what's important in the time you have with someone.