From the age of 15, Elle used to set herself missions. 

We want to let you know that this episode includes sexually explicit content and discussion of self harm and suicide, so take care listening. Some names and details in this story have been changed to protect the identities of the people in it.

This episode is part of our series 'Love'. A totally honest look at love, sex and dating - nothing held back.

This episode was produced by Jess Lawson and Arlie Adlington, with help from the VENT Production Team: Emilia Gill, Moeed Majeed and Kamiah Chae Cowell.

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