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70-Days to Change
Getting Ready to Travel
In this episode, we walk through the 70‑Day Change Plan — why it works, how it supports slow, sustainable change, and what it looks like to rebuild your life one honest day at a time. This is the foundation of the Living the Could Life approach.
Transcript
Click Here for Transcript
Disclaimer:
Before we dive into today's episode, a quick but important note. The information shared in this podcast is for general educational and entertainment purposes only. We love sharing our insights, but please remember, this content does not constitute medical, health, or professional advice.
Every body and every situation is unique. You should always consult with a qualified medical specialist or healthcare professional before starting any new program, making lifestyle changes, or acting on any information you hear today. Your health is your responsibility, so let's keep it safe.
Theresa:
Welcome back to Living the Good Life, the podcast where we talk about rebuilding a life after change, the kind of change that shifts your energy, your identity, your body, or your sense of what's possible. Today, we're diving into something that sits at the center of this entire project, the language of good, the science of neuroplasticity, and a 70-day rhythm that helps your brain adapt to a new reality. Be sure you listen to the disclaimer.
At the beginning, everything here that we say is just for education and entertainment. We're not doctors, lawyers, medical professionals. Oh, and by the way, I'm Theresa.
Robert:
And I'm Robert. This isn't just theory. This is lived experience, neuroscience, aging research, and the kind of gentle, sustainable change that actually works, especially for people navigating body changes, chronic illness, or later life transitions.
We're going to talk about Helmstetter, McGill, Yale, habit formation, and the two very different meanings of could.
Theresa:
And this is a bit of a review. We did talk about the meanings of could last week, but they fit in again with the 70-day change plan. There's probably a point that we all had where we realized we weren't going back to who we were and how our body was before it changed.
Your energy changed, your capacity changed, and you kept waiting for the old version of yourself to come back online, kind of like a system reboot that just needed one more time. But it didn't. And eventually, we all have to face the truth.
We weren't going back. We had to learn to build a new life from where we were and where we are now in this body with this energy and with this reality. And that's where this whole 70-day idea started to take shape.
For example, we recently built a house and are still building it. And my vision changed during that period. So although we were already building a house for aging in place.
Robert:
And that included things like 36-inch-wide doors to accommodate a wheelchair if that was ever necessary, lighting so that there were no dark areas in the house.
Theresa:
Walk-in shower, vanities where a wheelchair could fit under, and extra handrails, like double railings on any stairs. I found the basement stairs created a lot of psychological friction, like it was a magnet pulling me into the space. So we just extended a wall or a half wall so that I didn't feel like I was being pulled down the steps.
Robert:
And we also made the surfaces between the entryway and the basement steps, we made them very different so that they're visually distinctive.
Theresa:
That's right, and that helps me a lot. We also put tape on every other step because stairs for me look like they could be flat. And I am aware those are going to the basement.
Robert:
And this is what we're talking about today, neuroplasticity. If you've never heard that word before, it simply means this, your brain is capable of change, real change, structural change, even after illness, even after trauma, even after years of feeling stuck or slowed down or shut down.
Theresa:
Neuroplasticity is a science that proves your brain can form new pathways, not through force, not through willpower, but through small, repeated signals. Signals like noticing what felt easier today and signals like paying attention to what surprised you, what's given your body a moment of awareness instead of judgment.
Robert:
And here's the hopeful part. Your brain doesn't need perfection to rewire itself. It needs consistency, it needs gentleness, it needs repetition.
Theresa:
Think about somebody recovering after a stroke. In the beginning, they might only be able to move a finger or lift a spoon and with help, but with repeated tiny movements, the same motion, practice again and again, the brain starts building new pathways around the damaged ones. Over weeks and months, those small signals add up.
A hand that couldn't grip begins to hold, a leg that couldn't step begins to walk.
Robert:
Not because the person tried harder, but because the brain responded to repetition. That's neuroplasticity in action. And the same principle applies to emotional recovery, identity shifts, chronic illness, and rebuilding your life after change.
This brings us to Dr. Shad Helmstetter's research on self-talk, which is foundational to this whole conversation. In his What to Say When You Talk to Yourself, he outlines the five levels of self-talk and his core finding is simple but profound. The brain is a literal processor.
It doesn't distinguish between a wish and a command. It follows the strongest program it's given. This is important and worth repeating.
The brain is a literal processor. It doesn't distinguish between a wish and a command. It follows the strongest program it's given.
Now back to the levels. Level one is the I can't level, the level of negative acceptance, the most harmful, the least beneficial. You need to get rid of the I can'ts.
Theresa:
And when you analyze should versus could, Helmstetter places them in very different psychological tiers. Should is level two, recognition and disbelief. It sounds positive, but it's almost always followed by an unspoken, but.
Robert:
I should get more exercise, but I'm exhausted. I should eat better, but I don't have the energy. I should be more positive, but I'm overwhelmed.
Theresa:
Your subconscious hears should and registers guilt-based pressure. It triggers a defense mechanism. The brain justifies why you aren't doing the thing.
Action potential, low.
Robert:
But could is different. Could is level three, the decision to change. It moves you away from obligation and towards choice.
Theresa:
Should is external. Could is internal.
Robert:
Instead of I should eat better, you say I could choose a piece of fruit right now. It's concrete, it's low stakes, it's doable.
Theresa:
And it removes the all or nothing, thinking that kills most goals.
Robert:
Helmstetter also reminds us that while could is a powerful starter, the ultimate action trigger is level four, I am.
Theresa:
Oh, that sounds familiar, like Rene Descartes. So here are some examples of I am. I am an organized person who meets my duties with ease.
I am someone who honors my body's current pace. I'm becoming more confident every day.
Robert:
When you say I am, you give your brain a direct command. It works to resolve the cognitive dissonance between your words and your current reality. Your brain tries to make your actions match the identity you've claimed.
Theresa:
And then there's the pink elephant rule. Helmstetter points out that the brain doesn't process not. If you say I should not be nervous, the brain focuses on nervous.
Robert:
But if you say I could be calm or I am prepared, you give the brain a positive image to move forward. In the second episode, we discussed some linguistics where there were two very different meanings of could and they matter, especially in later life.
Theresa:
The first is the possibility could. The suggestion, it's a low affordance modal. It highlights that an option exists, but doesn't link to your internal drive.
Robert:
We could try this. It could work. It could be an option.
Theresa:
This lowers the threat response. It's great for brainstorming.
Robert:
But the second meaning is the ability could, the action trigger. It focuses on capability. It activates self-efficacy.
Theresa:
You have the skills. You could finish this today. You could take a 10-minute walk.
You could try a modified version.
Robert:
This version of could shifts the brain from possibility to identity. It says I am capable.
Theresa:
And now we get to the emotional heart of could. There are two coulds that show up in later life.
Robert:
The grief could is past tense ability. I could run faster 10 years ago. I could read without glasses.
I could do more before my diagnosis.
Theresa:
This anchors you in loss. It reinforces negative self-talk. It's a form of old talk.
The internalized ageism that tells you youth is the only standard of value.
Robert:
But the agency could is the present tense possibility. I could take a short walk today. I could try a new modification.
I could listen to what my body needs.
Theresa:
This is the bridge to level three. It shifts the focus from appearance to function. Research shows older adults who focus on what their bodies can do report significantly higher well-being.
Robert:
Let's shift into the neuroscience of habit formation, especially in later life. There's a myth that older adults struggle more with forming new habits, but the research actually shows something different.
Theresa:
And this is really interesting. Dr. Filippa Lally's work found that it takes an average of 66 days, roughly nine to 10 weeks, for a new behavior to become automatic. That's true across all ages.
But here's the twist. Older adults often stick to habits better once they're formed.
Robert:
This is called the age-perspective memory paradox. Older adults may process new information more slowly, but they're better at routines, consistency, and meaning-based learning.
Theresa:
And that's where Daly's research for meow comes in. Dr. Emily Daly found that older adults often adapt better than younger adults because they rely on pattern recognition, emotional regulation, meaning-based learning, and internal motivation. These are strategies, not deficits.
Robert:
A 2025 study from McGill University showed that 10 weeks of consistent cognitive practice rejuvenated the cholinergic system, the brain network responsible for learning, attention, and readiness to change in adults over 65.
Theresa:
10 weeks, not a weekend, not a burst of motivation, not a 30-day challenge.
Robert:
10 weeks is where the brain stops trying to think differently and simply starts thinking differently.
Theresa:
And this lines up with cognitive behavioral therapy research too. It's the core skill-building phase usually ends around week eight, with weeks nine and 10 serving as the integration phase.
Robert:
This is why your 70-day rhythm works. It's not motivational, it's biological.
Theresa:
So there are three phases of change in the 10-week model. The first weeks, one to three, are catch and release, kind of like fishing, right? This is where you simply notice your thoughts, especially the grief codes.
I could once do more. I could walk faster before. I could handle more 10 years ago.
You don't fight them. You don't fix them. You just say, I see you, and let them pass.
Robert:
Weeks four through seven, the micro-coulds. This is the agency phase, one tiny could a day. I could stretch for 30 seconds.
I could drink a glass of water. I could step outside for fresh air. These aren't fitness goals.
They're neural signals.
Theresa:
In phase three, which is weeks eight to 10, that's the I am integration phase. By week eight, the path is paved. Now you shift from I could to I am.
I am becoming more patient with my body. I am someone who notices my energy. I am rebuilding at my own pace.
Robert:
This is Helmstetter's level four, identity-driven change. This is where the brain rewires.
Theresa:
And here are some practical examples. I should lose weight. That feels like a burden.
I could enjoy a swim. That feels like a gift.
Robert:
Should is an external judge. Could is an internal explorer. You move from I could be active to I am a person who honors my body's current pace.
Theresa:
Identity rewires faster than suggestion. What are three things that your body could do today? Breathe deeply, hold a grandchild, or feel the sun on your face?
Robert:
This reframes the body from ornament to instrument. Now let's bring in the workbook, the heart of this whole journey. It's not about fixing your life.
It's about noticing it.
Theresa:
We'll be right back. And we have put together a 70-day workbook along with a 70-day calendar. The calendar has 70 different prompts.
The workbook has the same questions for 10 days. And at the end of 10 days, there's a reflection over what has changed. Both of these are available for a free download on the website, but I'm going to explain how they work.
So the workbook, each day you answer, like I said, the same five questions. Number one, what did I notice in my body today? Number two, what felt easier, even if only by 1%?
Number three, what felt harder or heavier? Number four, what surprised me? And number five, what do I want to remember from today?
Robert:
And that's it, five questions, a few minutes, no pressure, no performance.
Theresa:
And because of neuroplasticity, these tiny moments of noticing start to shift things. You begin to see patterns. You begin to understand your body differently.
You begin to trust yourself again.
Robert:
70 days gives your brain enough time to build new pathways, reinforce new patterns, soften old ones, adapt to your current reality, and create safety around change.
Theresa:
It's long enough to matter, but short enough to feel doable. And you don't have to be perfect. You don't have to catch up.
Your brain will accept whichever signals you give it. And here's some examples of some real life reinvention and micro adaptations for travel. So we've covered the science, the language, the aging research, the neural pathways.
Let's talk about what it looks like in real life. For me, the 70 day shift showed up in travel. And after my vision changed, I had to relearn how to move through the world.
Airports, walking distances, sensory overload, everything felt different. But I kept thinking I should be able to do this.
Robert:
But the truth was you could, not just instantly, your brain needed time to adapt.
Theresa:
Exactly. And as time went on, something softened. My body wasn't fighting me as much.
My brain wasn't panicking at every new variable. It wasn't perfect, but it was possible.
Robert:
For me, the 70 day shift showed up in reinvention. As a new caregiver, I had to rebuild routines, identity, even confidence. But the real shift happened slowly.
Tiny adjustments, tiny wins, tiny recalibrations.
Theresa:
And all of that is leading to that seeing eye guy vest. Change doesn't announce itself, it accumulates. It sneaks up on you.
One day you realize, oh, this doesn't feel so impossible anymore.
Robert:
That's the 70 day shift. Not a transformation, a quiet recalibration. Let's talk about how this applies to travel because travel is one of the biggest stressors for people whose bodies or brains have changed.
Theresa:
And that's why we built both the 70 day workbook and the 70 day calendar. They're a gentle, structured way to prepare your brain and your body for a trip. On days one to 20, it's all about identifying your travel fears.
They're about honesty, not positivity, not pretending, just naming the fears. Things like, I'll be a burden to the group or I'll be too tired. I won't keep up.
What if I need help? What if I slow everyone down?
Robert:
Naming the fear reduces the threat. It tells your brain, this is known, this is manageable. And that alone begins the adaptation process.
The next 30 days are about building what we call the destination script. A simple, repeatable phrase that trains your brain for the experience you want.
Theresa:
And this is where the McGill University research comes in. The part about improving speed and focus through repeated cognitive signals. You're literally building travel pathways in your brain.
Robert:
Your destination script might sound like, I navigate the world at my own pace and the view is just as beautiful or I travel differently now and that's okay. Or I move slowly, but I still move.
Theresa:
And you repeat this daily, not to hype yourself up, but to give your brain a consistent signal. Days 51 to 70 are all about visualization and softening. It's not the Pinterest perfect kind or the Instagram shot, but it's grounded, realistic, and kind.
Picture yourself using the elevator without shame, taking breaks without apology, enjoying a short excursion with a walking stick or just sitting on a bench, enjoying a beautiful fiesta.
Robert:
This is where the brain starts to soften, where the panic response lowers, where the new pattern begins to feel familiar.
Theresa:
And that's the whole point. Not perfection, but familiarity. So here's how the workbook and the calendar work.
You need to notice it as a daily practice. So now that we've talked about the science and the real life application, let's talk about the tool that ties all of this together, the workbook and the calendar. Neither are homework.
It's not a performance. It's not a test of discipline. It's a noticing practice.
And noticing is the mechanism of neuroplasticity. Okay, so there is some research by Becca Levy of Yale dealing with aging. So if you do want a reason to believe this matters, look at Dr. Becca Levy's work at Yale. There is a link in the show notes on the website. She found that your beliefs about aging are a better predictor of your lifespan than your cholesterol or blood pressure.
Robert:
Changing your codes isn't fluffy talk. It's a longevity strategy.
Theresa:
If you're in a season of rebuilding or redefining or simply trying to understand yourself again, the 70 day journey is for you. It's gentle, it's grounded, it's accessible, and it's built on real science and real lived experience.
Robert:
Your brain is still capable of change. Your life is still capable of change. And you don't have to do it all at once.
Theresa:
Just one day at a time, one moment of noticing at a time, one tiny signal at a time. Next time, we will be talking about cruising in Alaska. So start doing your workbooks and calendars and getting ready to travel.
We have been to Alaska many, many times, have lots of tips, been there pre and post.
Robert:
It's one of our favorite destinations.
Theresa:
Definitely. And there are options there for people with body changes.
Robert:
Thanks for being here. Let's begin.
Show Notes
Music
Opening Theme
“Carpe Diem” by Kevin MacLeod
Licensed under Creative Commons: Attribution 4.0
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
Source: incompetech.com
Interlude:
"Ascending the Vale" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
Closing Theme
“Bloom” via Pixabay
CC0 License (No attribution required)
Source: pixabay.com/music
Mentioned in Living the Could Life
Dr. Shad Helmstetter's What to Say When You Talk to Yourself
70-Day Change Calendar
70-Day Change Workbook
Effects of Computerized Cognitive Training on Vesicular Acetylcholine Transporter Levels Effects of Computerized Cognitive Training on Vesicular Acetylcholine Transporter Levels
Longevity Increased by Positive Self-Perceptions of Aging
Breaking the Age Code: How Your Beliefs About Aging Determine How Long and Well You Live
View all episodes
By Robert and TheresaGetting Ready to Travel
In this episode, we walk through the 70‑Day Change Plan — why it works, how it supports slow, sustainable change, and what it looks like to rebuild your life one honest day at a time. This is the foundation of the Living the Could Life approach.
Transcript
Click Here for Transcript
Disclaimer:
Before we dive into today's episode, a quick but important note. The information shared in this podcast is for general educational and entertainment purposes only. We love sharing our insights, but please remember, this content does not constitute medical, health, or professional advice.
Every body and every situation is unique. You should always consult with a qualified medical specialist or healthcare professional before starting any new program, making lifestyle changes, or acting on any information you hear today. Your health is your responsibility, so let's keep it safe.
Theresa:
Welcome back to Living the Good Life, the podcast where we talk about rebuilding a life after change, the kind of change that shifts your energy, your identity, your body, or your sense of what's possible. Today, we're diving into something that sits at the center of this entire project, the language of good, the science of neuroplasticity, and a 70-day rhythm that helps your brain adapt to a new reality. Be sure you listen to the disclaimer.
At the beginning, everything here that we say is just for education and entertainment. We're not doctors, lawyers, medical professionals. Oh, and by the way, I'm Theresa.
Robert:
And I'm Robert. This isn't just theory. This is lived experience, neuroscience, aging research, and the kind of gentle, sustainable change that actually works, especially for people navigating body changes, chronic illness, or later life transitions.
We're going to talk about Helmstetter, McGill, Yale, habit formation, and the two very different meanings of could.
Theresa:
And this is a bit of a review. We did talk about the meanings of could last week, but they fit in again with the 70-day change plan. There's probably a point that we all had where we realized we weren't going back to who we were and how our body was before it changed.
Your energy changed, your capacity changed, and you kept waiting for the old version of yourself to come back online, kind of like a system reboot that just needed one more time. But it didn't. And eventually, we all have to face the truth.
We weren't going back. We had to learn to build a new life from where we were and where we are now in this body with this energy and with this reality. And that's where this whole 70-day idea started to take shape.
For example, we recently built a house and are still building it. And my vision changed during that period. So although we were already building a house for aging in place.
Robert:
And that included things like 36-inch-wide doors to accommodate a wheelchair if that was ever necessary, lighting so that there were no dark areas in the house.
Theresa:
Walk-in shower, vanities where a wheelchair could fit under, and extra handrails, like double railings on any stairs. I found the basement stairs created a lot of psychological friction, like it was a magnet pulling me into the space. So we just extended a wall or a half wall so that I didn't feel like I was being pulled down the steps.
Robert:
And we also made the surfaces between the entryway and the basement steps, we made them very different so that they're visually distinctive.
Theresa:
That's right, and that helps me a lot. We also put tape on every other step because stairs for me look like they could be flat. And I am aware those are going to the basement.
Robert:
And this is what we're talking about today, neuroplasticity. If you've never heard that word before, it simply means this, your brain is capable of change, real change, structural change, even after illness, even after trauma, even after years of feeling stuck or slowed down or shut down.
Theresa:
Neuroplasticity is a science that proves your brain can form new pathways, not through force, not through willpower, but through small, repeated signals. Signals like noticing what felt easier today and signals like paying attention to what surprised you, what's given your body a moment of awareness instead of judgment.
Robert:
And here's the hopeful part. Your brain doesn't need perfection to rewire itself. It needs consistency, it needs gentleness, it needs repetition.
Theresa:
Think about somebody recovering after a stroke. In the beginning, they might only be able to move a finger or lift a spoon and with help, but with repeated tiny movements, the same motion, practice again and again, the brain starts building new pathways around the damaged ones. Over weeks and months, those small signals add up.
A hand that couldn't grip begins to hold, a leg that couldn't step begins to walk.
Robert:
Not because the person tried harder, but because the brain responded to repetition. That's neuroplasticity in action. And the same principle applies to emotional recovery, identity shifts, chronic illness, and rebuilding your life after change.
This brings us to Dr. Shad Helmstetter's research on self-talk, which is foundational to this whole conversation. In his What to Say When You Talk to Yourself, he outlines the five levels of self-talk and his core finding is simple but profound. The brain is a literal processor.
It doesn't distinguish between a wish and a command. It follows the strongest program it's given. This is important and worth repeating.
The brain is a literal processor. It doesn't distinguish between a wish and a command. It follows the strongest program it's given.
Now back to the levels. Level one is the I can't level, the level of negative acceptance, the most harmful, the least beneficial. You need to get rid of the I can'ts.
Theresa:
And when you analyze should versus could, Helmstetter places them in very different psychological tiers. Should is level two, recognition and disbelief. It sounds positive, but it's almost always followed by an unspoken, but.
Robert:
I should get more exercise, but I'm exhausted. I should eat better, but I don't have the energy. I should be more positive, but I'm overwhelmed.
Theresa:
Your subconscious hears should and registers guilt-based pressure. It triggers a defense mechanism. The brain justifies why you aren't doing the thing.
Action potential, low.
Robert:
But could is different. Could is level three, the decision to change. It moves you away from obligation and towards choice.
Theresa:
Should is external. Could is internal.
Robert:
Instead of I should eat better, you say I could choose a piece of fruit right now. It's concrete, it's low stakes, it's doable.
Theresa:
And it removes the all or nothing, thinking that kills most goals.
Robert:
Helmstetter also reminds us that while could is a powerful starter, the ultimate action trigger is level four, I am.
Theresa:
Oh, that sounds familiar, like Rene Descartes. So here are some examples of I am. I am an organized person who meets my duties with ease.
I am someone who honors my body's current pace. I'm becoming more confident every day.
Robert:
When you say I am, you give your brain a direct command. It works to resolve the cognitive dissonance between your words and your current reality. Your brain tries to make your actions match the identity you've claimed.
Theresa:
And then there's the pink elephant rule. Helmstetter points out that the brain doesn't process not. If you say I should not be nervous, the brain focuses on nervous.
Robert:
But if you say I could be calm or I am prepared, you give the brain a positive image to move forward. In the second episode, we discussed some linguistics where there were two very different meanings of could and they matter, especially in later life.
Theresa:
The first is the possibility could. The suggestion, it's a low affordance modal. It highlights that an option exists, but doesn't link to your internal drive.
Robert:
We could try this. It could work. It could be an option.
Theresa:
This lowers the threat response. It's great for brainstorming.
Robert:
But the second meaning is the ability could, the action trigger. It focuses on capability. It activates self-efficacy.
Theresa:
You have the skills. You could finish this today. You could take a 10-minute walk.
You could try a modified version.
Robert:
This version of could shifts the brain from possibility to identity. It says I am capable.
Theresa:
And now we get to the emotional heart of could. There are two coulds that show up in later life.
Robert:
The grief could is past tense ability. I could run faster 10 years ago. I could read without glasses.
I could do more before my diagnosis.
Theresa:
This anchors you in loss. It reinforces negative self-talk. It's a form of old talk.
The internalized ageism that tells you youth is the only standard of value.
Robert:
But the agency could is the present tense possibility. I could take a short walk today. I could try a new modification.
I could listen to what my body needs.
Theresa:
This is the bridge to level three. It shifts the focus from appearance to function. Research shows older adults who focus on what their bodies can do report significantly higher well-being.
Robert:
Let's shift into the neuroscience of habit formation, especially in later life. There's a myth that older adults struggle more with forming new habits, but the research actually shows something different.
Theresa:
And this is really interesting. Dr. Filippa Lally's work found that it takes an average of 66 days, roughly nine to 10 weeks, for a new behavior to become automatic. That's true across all ages.
But here's the twist. Older adults often stick to habits better once they're formed.
Robert:
This is called the age-perspective memory paradox. Older adults may process new information more slowly, but they're better at routines, consistency, and meaning-based learning.
Theresa:
And that's where Daly's research for meow comes in. Dr. Emily Daly found that older adults often adapt better than younger adults because they rely on pattern recognition, emotional regulation, meaning-based learning, and internal motivation. These are strategies, not deficits.
Robert:
A 2025 study from McGill University showed that 10 weeks of consistent cognitive practice rejuvenated the cholinergic system, the brain network responsible for learning, attention, and readiness to change in adults over 65.
Theresa:
10 weeks, not a weekend, not a burst of motivation, not a 30-day challenge.
Robert:
10 weeks is where the brain stops trying to think differently and simply starts thinking differently.
Theresa:
And this lines up with cognitive behavioral therapy research too. It's the core skill-building phase usually ends around week eight, with weeks nine and 10 serving as the integration phase.
Robert:
This is why your 70-day rhythm works. It's not motivational, it's biological.
Theresa:
So there are three phases of change in the 10-week model. The first weeks, one to three, are catch and release, kind of like fishing, right? This is where you simply notice your thoughts, especially the grief codes.
I could once do more. I could walk faster before. I could handle more 10 years ago.
You don't fight them. You don't fix them. You just say, I see you, and let them pass.
Robert:
Weeks four through seven, the micro-coulds. This is the agency phase, one tiny could a day. I could stretch for 30 seconds.
I could drink a glass of water. I could step outside for fresh air. These aren't fitness goals.
They're neural signals.
Theresa:
In phase three, which is weeks eight to 10, that's the I am integration phase. By week eight, the path is paved. Now you shift from I could to I am.
I am becoming more patient with my body. I am someone who notices my energy. I am rebuilding at my own pace.
Robert:
This is Helmstetter's level four, identity-driven change. This is where the brain rewires.
Theresa:
And here are some practical examples. I should lose weight. That feels like a burden.
I could enjoy a swim. That feels like a gift.
Robert:
Should is an external judge. Could is an internal explorer. You move from I could be active to I am a person who honors my body's current pace.
Theresa:
Identity rewires faster than suggestion. What are three things that your body could do today? Breathe deeply, hold a grandchild, or feel the sun on your face?
Robert:
This reframes the body from ornament to instrument. Now let's bring in the workbook, the heart of this whole journey. It's not about fixing your life.
It's about noticing it.
Theresa:
We'll be right back. And we have put together a 70-day workbook along with a 70-day calendar. The calendar has 70 different prompts.
The workbook has the same questions for 10 days. And at the end of 10 days, there's a reflection over what has changed. Both of these are available for a free download on the website, but I'm going to explain how they work.
So the workbook, each day you answer, like I said, the same five questions. Number one, what did I notice in my body today? Number two, what felt easier, even if only by 1%?
Number three, what felt harder or heavier? Number four, what surprised me? And number five, what do I want to remember from today?
Robert:
And that's it, five questions, a few minutes, no pressure, no performance.
Theresa:
And because of neuroplasticity, these tiny moments of noticing start to shift things. You begin to see patterns. You begin to understand your body differently.
You begin to trust yourself again.
Robert:
70 days gives your brain enough time to build new pathways, reinforce new patterns, soften old ones, adapt to your current reality, and create safety around change.
Theresa:
It's long enough to matter, but short enough to feel doable. And you don't have to be perfect. You don't have to catch up.
Your brain will accept whichever signals you give it. And here's some examples of some real life reinvention and micro adaptations for travel. So we've covered the science, the language, the aging research, the neural pathways.
Let's talk about what it looks like in real life. For me, the 70 day shift showed up in travel. And after my vision changed, I had to relearn how to move through the world.
Airports, walking distances, sensory overload, everything felt different. But I kept thinking I should be able to do this.
Robert:
But the truth was you could, not just instantly, your brain needed time to adapt.
Theresa:
Exactly. And as time went on, something softened. My body wasn't fighting me as much.
My brain wasn't panicking at every new variable. It wasn't perfect, but it was possible.
Robert:
For me, the 70 day shift showed up in reinvention. As a new caregiver, I had to rebuild routines, identity, even confidence. But the real shift happened slowly.
Tiny adjustments, tiny wins, tiny recalibrations.
Theresa:
And all of that is leading to that seeing eye guy vest. Change doesn't announce itself, it accumulates. It sneaks up on you.
One day you realize, oh, this doesn't feel so impossible anymore.
Robert:
That's the 70 day shift. Not a transformation, a quiet recalibration. Let's talk about how this applies to travel because travel is one of the biggest stressors for people whose bodies or brains have changed.
Theresa:
And that's why we built both the 70 day workbook and the 70 day calendar. They're a gentle, structured way to prepare your brain and your body for a trip. On days one to 20, it's all about identifying your travel fears.
They're about honesty, not positivity, not pretending, just naming the fears. Things like, I'll be a burden to the group or I'll be too tired. I won't keep up.
What if I need help? What if I slow everyone down?
Robert:
Naming the fear reduces the threat. It tells your brain, this is known, this is manageable. And that alone begins the adaptation process.
The next 30 days are about building what we call the destination script. A simple, repeatable phrase that trains your brain for the experience you want.
Theresa:
And this is where the McGill University research comes in. The part about improving speed and focus through repeated cognitive signals. You're literally building travel pathways in your brain.
Robert:
Your destination script might sound like, I navigate the world at my own pace and the view is just as beautiful or I travel differently now and that's okay. Or I move slowly, but I still move.
Theresa:
And you repeat this daily, not to hype yourself up, but to give your brain a consistent signal. Days 51 to 70 are all about visualization and softening. It's not the Pinterest perfect kind or the Instagram shot, but it's grounded, realistic, and kind.
Picture yourself using the elevator without shame, taking breaks without apology, enjoying a short excursion with a walking stick or just sitting on a bench, enjoying a beautiful fiesta.
Robert:
This is where the brain starts to soften, where the panic response lowers, where the new pattern begins to feel familiar.
Theresa:
And that's the whole point. Not perfection, but familiarity. So here's how the workbook and the calendar work.
You need to notice it as a daily practice. So now that we've talked about the science and the real life application, let's talk about the tool that ties all of this together, the workbook and the calendar. Neither are homework.
It's not a performance. It's not a test of discipline. It's a noticing practice.
And noticing is the mechanism of neuroplasticity. Okay, so there is some research by Becca Levy of Yale dealing with aging. So if you do want a reason to believe this matters, look at Dr. Becca Levy's work at Yale. There is a link in the show notes on the website. She found that your beliefs about aging are a better predictor of your lifespan than your cholesterol or blood pressure.
Robert:
Changing your codes isn't fluffy talk. It's a longevity strategy.
Theresa:
If you're in a season of rebuilding or redefining or simply trying to understand yourself again, the 70 day journey is for you. It's gentle, it's grounded, it's accessible, and it's built on real science and real lived experience.
Robert:
Your brain is still capable of change. Your life is still capable of change. And you don't have to do it all at once.
Theresa:
Just one day at a time, one moment of noticing at a time, one tiny signal at a time. Next time, we will be talking about cruising in Alaska. So start doing your workbooks and calendars and getting ready to travel.
We have been to Alaska many, many times, have lots of tips, been there pre and post.
Robert:
It's one of our favorite destinations.
Theresa:
Definitely. And there are options there for people with body changes.
Robert:
Thanks for being here. Let's begin.
Show Notes
Music
Opening Theme
“Carpe Diem” by Kevin MacLeod
Licensed under Creative Commons: Attribution 4.0
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
Source: incompetech.com
Interlude:
"Ascending the Vale" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
Closing Theme
“Bloom” via Pixabay
CC0 License (No attribution required)
Source: pixabay.com/music
Mentioned in Living the Could Life
Dr. Shad Helmstetter's What to Say When You Talk to Yourself
70-Day Change Calendar
70-Day Change Workbook
Effects of Computerized Cognitive Training on Vesicular Acetylcholine Transporter Levels Effects of Computerized Cognitive Training on Vesicular Acetylcholine Transporter Levels
Longevity Increased by Positive Self-Perceptions of Aging
Breaking the Age Code: How Your Beliefs About Aging Determine How Long and Well You Live