Relationships Let's Talk About It!

72. Getting Along With Your Ex


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Maureen McCarthy is a living testament that just because a marriage ended, it doesn't mean it has failed. When doctors told Maureen that she would die from a rare genetic illness, she ended her 10-year marriage with her husband, Bill. Yet, Maureen and Bill collaborate to maintain a relationship that's healthy for both of them and their children. She knew that the fear-driven stories that revolve around marriage and divorce aren't the only stories that exist. Carrying this insight with her, Maureen co-founded the Center for Collaborative Awareness, home of the Blueprint of We Collaboration Process, which helps people build and keep sincere and strong relationships.

In today's episode, Maureen and I discuss how to design a break-up or divorce process, why you should maintain a healthy relationship with an ex-partner, and how to get along with your ex after a break-up or divorce. We discuss why Maureen and Bill opted for a divorce and how they collaborated to maintain their friendship after their marriage ended. We also highlight how a healthy divorce affects children positively and underscore the power of purposefully designing a relationship.

"Relationships are like containers. You're going to be in a relationship as long as you can call it a memory. There's no real ending to a relationship. You have to morph the container to fit the new situation." - Maureen McCarthy

This week on Relationships! Let's Talk About It:

  • Why Maureen and her ex-husband opted for divorce
  • Why Maureen decided to maintain a relationship with her ex-husband
  • How Maureen and her ex-husband collaborated for a graceful divorce
  • The effect of a graceful and healthy divorce on children
  • What is "lookback learning" and how to use it days after an argument
  • Maureen's childhood experience with her parents' divorce and how it affected her
  • The difference between the "safety" brain and the "connecting" brain
  • The power of designing a relationship with an ex-partner
  • How maintaining a good friendship with her ex positively affected Maureen's health
  • The importance of self-care, ownership, and accountability when transitioning into a divorce

Resources Mentioned:

  • Designing Collaborative Relationships with Maureen McCarthy
  • Coming Apart: How to Heal Your Broken Heart by Daphne Rose Kingma

Connect with Maureen McCarthy:

  • The Center for Collaborative Awareness (use the code "Pripo" to receive 50% off the Blueprint of We document)
  • Maureen McCarthy on LinkedIn

Let's Talk About It!

Thanks for tuning into this week's episode of Relationships! Let's Talk About It - the show to help you forge deeper, more meaningful connections and relationships with those around you. If you enjoyed this week's episode, please head over to Apple Podcasts, subscribe to the show, and leave us a rating and review.

If you have a relationship question you'd love to have answered, visit our podcast page to leave us a voice message. Your question may be featured on a future episode!

Don't forget to visit our website, like us on Facebook at HeartShare Counseling, join our Relationships! Let's Talk About It Facebook group, and follow us on Twitter and Instagram. Share your favorite episodes on social media to help others build better, more meaningful relationships.

And if our content has helped you forge deeper connections and more meaningful relationships, be sure to help support the show by visiting our Support the Podcast page!

Theme music "These Streets" provided by Adi the Monk

Relationships! Let's Talk About It is produced by Auxbus. You can create your own great podcast - faster and easier - at Auxbus.com

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Relationships Let's Talk About It!By Pripo Teplitsky

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