Happy New Year! It's the first show of 2017, and we kick it off with an important public service announcement from the Two Headed Barry White Creature, who wants to remind you to prevent forest fires. He/they also want to talk about which animals turn them on, so don't give them too much credit for selfless service.

We also introduce Suzie May Haagen, elite special forces soldier and lover of crafts. She's going on her first strike op, and must review the 5 principles of stealth. One of them might be croutons. She doesn't know.

We hope you're enjoying 2017 as much as someone who is REALLY enjoying 2017. Or even more than that guy.