The Joshua Sigafus Podcast

#82 Don't Let Your Dating Failures Define You


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If you've ever failed at the dating game (and we all have), you may be tempted to feel discouraged. Here is some advice to help you through it.

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Excerpt: 

So failures happen, failures are not fun, they are a fact of life, they're going to happen to you. If they don't happen every day, you're very fortunate. But then again, you're not unfortunate it failures happen to you. The thing about failing, whether it's in dating, you know, getting rejected, whether it's, you know, getting broken up with, and thinking about that as a failure, or whether it is feeling like, you know, you can never succeed in looking as good as you want to, or, you know, you feel like you're terrible at flirting, or when you try to get a number, it doesn't work, or when you try to, you know, talk to that guy you like, he doesn't respond, well, you know, it doesn't matter if you're a man or a woman failure has happened to all of us. And so the thing that's important to keep in mind is not, you know, the goal is not to wish the failure didn't happen. The goal is to learn from our failures make them they're our greatest lessons, I have learned more about dating, and attraction and human mating behavior, from my failed experiences than from the successful ones. Because the successful ones, you know, you're just happy that they happened. And you're like, Oh, this is so nice. I'm glad this happened. But that's not the real meat of the experience, you know, the real stuff happens when you really fail. And that gives you a powerful metric to measure against. It's like, Well, why? Why didn't this go the way I wanted it to? Why did this end up so badly? Like, what could have been done to avoid this, you know, and that's how we turn failures into great lessons. This is very important. 

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The Joshua Sigafus PodcastBy Joshua Sigafus