What do I mean? - divorce is usually either clear cut: cheating, abuse, financial ruin, or harmful to the kids are the no-brainers. Or the grey area of "irreconcilable differences": this is where the divorce scale comes out. I find this is a dangerous area - it allows blatant marriage abandonment: usually masked as "good for the kids" (nope, a kid wrecker) - while pure selfishness is what really fuels it.

Where are you on the scale? What kinds of BS did your ex give you to justify her side?