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A Letters to Women Update

Join Chloe Langr as she explores how Catholic women embrace their unique feminine genius in their ordinary, daily life.

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In this sixth episode of the Letters to Mothers season, we’re talking about infertility. What if you long for physical motherhood and spiritual motherhood feels like a consolation prize, like a second-rate motherhood?
What if you’re experiencing infertility, whether it’s a season of infertility with hope of a positive pregnancy test some day or permanent infertility and you wonder if you have any space in conversations about the feminine genius and motherhood?
Infertility is a burden that most women and couples don’t expect to carry. It can impact your marriage, your relationship with friends and family, and your relationship with God. On top of that, infertility often feels like a lonely and long path. But you aren’t alone. We’re talking about dismantling the lies around infertility, the importance of community in this journey, and how to support your spouse as you carry the cross of infertility together. 
Wherever you are on the path of infertility, if you’re looking for a place of respite, solidarity, and encouragement, this episode of the Letters to Women podcast with Ann Koshute is for you. 


Topics we cover:

 Ann’s story as a Catholic woman

 The story of Springs in the Desert

  The importance of language around the experience of infertility

  How infertility impacts marriage and Ann’s advice for processing emotions and grief in the shared experience of infertility 

  The importance of community in the experience of infertility and the resources that Springs in the Desert offers

  How to live in the present moment during the experience of infertility 

  Simple ways of generosity and how you can be fruitful in your marriage

  What spiritual motherhood means in your life 

  Ann’s advice for couples receiving a diagnosis of male infertility and how wives can support their husbands through that diagnosis 

  How Ann lives out the feminine genius in her daily life 



Resources for you:

  Springs in the Desert

  Springs in the Desert podcast 

  Listen to A Letter to the Mother Wondering about Foster Care and Adoption, featuring Kimberly Henkel, co-founder of Springs in the Desert 

  Today’s episode is sponsored by Rooted for Good - use the code LETTERS20 to save 20% at checkout

  Become a paid subscriber to Naptime Notes and get early, ad free access to all the Letters to Women episodes for just $5 a month



Discussion questions: 

  Has your experience of infertility left you feeling alone, or like you don’t belong? What is one practical resolution you can make today to connect with other women experiencing infertility? 


  How has infertility impacted your marriage? Have you struggled with objectifying your spouse or reducing sex to a means to an end of conceiving a child together? 


  In your experience with infertility, have you given in to despair or the belief that God has forgotten you, doesn’t love you, or is punishing you? How can you reject those lies, and who in your life can speak truth over you that you are a beloved daughter of God who is remembered and known?


  How do you deal with the stress of experiencing infertility? What are some healthy ways that you can process the emotions around this cross and 


  Do you find it challenging to take things day by day in your experience with infertility? What are ways that you can surrender the past, trust God with the future, and be present to the now? 



A Letter to the Mother Who Feels Like Her Spiritual Maternity Is a Consolation Prize // Ann Koshute

In this fifth episode of the Letters to Mothers season, we’re talking about mothering our babies who we’ve lost in miscarriage, still birth, and infant loss. Losing a child is heartbreaking and devastating. For mothers who lose a child before or shortly after birth, this grief comes with distinct, sudden, and difficult questions about God, the Church, and who they are now as parents to the child they have lost. 
If you’re looking for a companion and guide through those har medical, theological, and practical questions, whether you’re a mother who has lost her baby or you’re a friend, family member, or medical professional who supports parents through that loss, this episode of the Letters to Women podcast with Dr. Abigail Jorgensen is for you. 
Topics we cover: 

 Abby’s story as as Catholic woman

 The origin story of Abby’s new book, A Catholic Guide to Miscarriage, Stillbirth, and Infant Loss: Compassionate Answers to Difficult Questions

  A brief overview of miscarriage, still birth, and infant loss, and what the postpartum experiences can look like for mothers in each experience

  Abby’s favorite question to ask her clients as a bereavement doula 

  What the Catholic Church teaches us about our hope for Heaven for children we’ve lost through miscarriage, still birth, or infant loss

  How to grieve together and separately as loss parents 

  How to wrestle with the reality that God is all powerful, all good, and yet our babies still die

  Whether or not you can flush during a miscarriage

  How Abby lives out the feminine genius in her ordinary life as a mother


Resources for you:

  Pick up a copy of Abby’s new book, A Catholic Guide to Miscarriage, Stillbirth, and Infant Loss

  If you want to learn more about Abby’s work as a sociologist, explore her website here

  If you want to learn more about Abby’s work as a Catholic bereavement doula, explore this website

  To discuss grief ministry training with Abby, reach out to her through Haven Bereavement Doulas 

  Today’s episode is sponsored by Monks Bread - use the code LETTERS10 to save 10% at checkout 

  Become a paid subscriber to Naptime Notes and get early, ad free access to all the Letters to Women episodes for just $5 a month


Discussion questions: 

  Have you lost a child through miscarriage, still birth, or infant loss? What has your experience of mothering your child or children who have died look like for you'?


  How has losing a child through miscarriage, still birth, or infant loss impacted your relationship with the Lord? What are some moments of desolation and consolation you’ve experienced during the grieving process? 


  Have you felt angry at God during your grieving process? Have you felt guilt for feeling anger? How did hearing Abby share about allowing ourselves to grieve and be angry impact you? 


  Today, how are you parenting the child or children you’ve lost? What are some ways you can honor the memory of their short life here on earth while looking forward with hope to


  What are some ways that you can support friends and family who are grieving the loss of their child? What does it look like as a Church and parish community to support grieving parents? 



A Letter to the Mother Grieving Her Baby Who Died // Dr. Abigail Jorgensen

In this fourth episode of the Letters to Mothers series, Johanna Seagren joins me to discuss emotional regulation, our interior life, and burnout in our motherhood. 
Parenting is hard work, and sometimes it’s louder, messier, more complicated, and packed with tantrums (yours included) than you expected. 
So many times, we end up exhausted and feeling like this can’t be the vision that God had for your family. We’re diving into a conversation about what it means to be an emotionally-healthy family without losing your mind. 
If you’re ready to understand your own emotional triggers, learn how to connect with your kids instead of reacting to their big feelings, and grow closer to each other and God, this episode is for you. 
Topics we cover:



 Johanna’s story as a Catholic woman

 Why Johanna created the Interior Kingdom as an emotional regulation program for her family and what Catholic families will find inside the program

  What the Catholic Church teaches about emotions and what it looks like to grow in our awareness of our emotions as adults

  The things that set Interior Kingdom apart from the calm kits and calm down spaces you’ve seen on Instagram

  How to become curious about the triggers (unmet needs!) in your parenting 

  The reason that Interior Kingdom is for every family, regardless of your kids’ ages, abilities, and temperaments 

  How Johanna lives out the feminine genius in her daily life as a Catholic mother 


Resources for you:

  Explore the Interior Kingdom program (and use the code LTW25 for $25 off the program now through April 10, 2024!)

  Today’s episode sponsor is Rooted for Good! Use the code Letters20 for 20% off your order at checkout

  Check out my monthly newsletter, Naptime Notes


Questions for discussion: 


  What have been some moments of disregulation in your motherhood? And on the flip side, what have been some moments of peace, regulation, and rest in your parenting journey?

  When you were a child, what did your parents teach you about emotions? Do you feel confident in your understanding of emotions or is there room for growth?

  What are some of your triggers (unmet needs) in your motherhood and how can you begin to meet those needs and invite the Lord into those unmet needs?

  Have you ever felt guilty for anger in your motherhood? How did Johanna’s explanation of anger impact your understanding of emotions you may have labeled as “bad” before? 

  How can learning more about your emotions as a mother impact the way that you parent and live out the feminine genius in your daily life?



A Letter to the Mother Who Is Trying to Make It to Bedtime without Yelling // Johanna Seagren

In this third episode of the Letters to Mothers series, Kimberly Henkel of Springs of Love joins me to discuss foster care and adoption. 
We’re talking about how Kimberly and her husband Greg discerned the call to foster care. We’re also busting myths around adoption that might be holding you back from discerning that call as a family, and both of us are sharing our experiences as adoptive mothers. 
Whether you’re exploring the possibility of adoption or foster care, you’re already an adoptive or foster mother, or you’re wondering how to better support adoptive and foster families in your community, this letter is for you. 
Topics we cover: 

 Kimberly’s story as a Catholic woman

 How Kimberly and Greg discerned the Lord’s call to foster care and adoption

  The origin story of Springs of Love, Kimberly and Greg’s ministry that  encourages, educates, and equips Catholics to discern and live out the call to foster and adopt

  The differences between foster care and adoption

  Spiritual maternity and the adoption triad

  Kimberly’s advice to couples hesitant to discern foster care or adoption because of the cost

  Why open adoptions can be healthy for everyone involved in the adoption triad


Resources for you:



  Find Springs of Love online

  Watch the Springs of Love video series

  Ten Myths about Adoption from the Springs of Love website

  Check out my monthly newsletter, Naptime Notes

Discussion questions:



  Have you felt called by the Lord to discern growing your family through adoption or fostering children? What has that discernment looked like for you both as an individual and in your marriage?

  What myth surrounding adoption that Kimberly mentioned in the show is something you’ve believed to be true before?

  Romans 8:15 says that “You did not receive a spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you received a spirit of adoption, through which we call ‘Abba, Father!’” How does reflecting on this theological reality of adoption in all of our lives as children of God through baptism impact the way you think about adoption and foster care? 

  What are ways that you can accompany birth mothers and families in the adoption triad? 

  Does your parish community support adoptive and foster families well? What are things you can do to encourage a culture of life for families who are called to foster or adopt? 



A Letter to the Mother Wondering about Foster Care and Adoption

In this second episode of the Letters to Mothers series, Grace Stark from Natural Womanhood joins me to discuss fertility awareness and motherhood. 
This is a conversation about authentic womens’ healthcare, how to grow in an appreciation of your fertility as a gift, and discerning the size of family that the Lord wants to build with and for you—and what to do if you’re not on the same page as your spouse in that discernment. 
We also talk about what it means to be mothers to daughters, and how the conversations we have from a very young age shape the way our daughters see their bodies. 
If you’re ready to get to know and appreciate your cycle and fertility this letter is for you.

Topics we cover:

 Grace’s story as a Catholic woman

 The origin story of Natural Womanhood and their mission to help women work with their body, not against it

  What authentic women’s healthcare looks like and how we can grow as women in accepting our fertility as a gift

  What the Catholic Church teaches about using Natural Family Planning and family size

  Grace’s advice for couples in seasons of discerning adding another child to their family

  What to do when you’re not on the same page as your spouse about having more children

  How Natural Womanhood is helping mothers of pre-teen girls learn about ther bodies, cycles, and fertility

  How Shelby lives out the feminine genius as a mother


Resources for you:

  Discover Natural Womanhood online 

  Natural Womanhood podcast 

  Charting Towards Intimacy podcast hosted by Ellen Holloway

  Check out the sponsor for today’s episode, Interior Kingdom! Use the code LTW15 for 15% off the full Interior Kingdom program. 

  Check out my monthly newsletter, Naptime Notes


Discussion questions: 

  Have you ever felt angry or ashamed of your cycle as a woman? What were some messages that you received about your body as a girl, especially around your fertility and cycles? 


  Do you feel pressure to have a certain number of kids as a Catholic woman? Or for your family to look a certain way? What are some ways you can grow in confidence about how the Lord is calling you specifically to mother?


  Are you and your spouse of one heart and mind when it comes to having children? What advice that Grace shared in this episode about discerning a family with your spouse struck you? 


  If you’re a mother to a daughter, how have you approached conversations with her about fertility and puberty? Are there things you want to change about how you talk about those subjects after listening to this episode? 


  What dreams do you have for your family and your motherhood? How can embracing your fertility as a gift impact those dreams? 



A Letters to Women Update

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