Episode 87 topics...

1. Lady answered phone and asked Abe if he was hungry

2. Lawyer was talking about details of case while taking a dump

3. ATM machines give you subtle hints if you're a degenerate

4. Abe and Bass want to be each others food sponsors

5. Telemarketer butchered Abe's name

6. Bass worked as a telemarketer in high school

7. Four-hour diet and fad diets

8. People who speak all of their text messages

9. Abe's retention tip and an equally good new tip

10. People who speak the hip new lingo

11. Puff Daddy's new song is the worst ever

12. Aerosmith video gave kids horrible message

13. Guy wore beats headphones while blaring music in his car

14. Impromptu Douchebag Power Rankings