In this episode of Vassalage: Truth, Lies, and Power, control doesn’t always look like control. Through two revealing letters — I start to uncover the many layers of abuse my father used against my mother.  Gaslighting, coercive control, contemp, manipulation - all forms of verbal abuse that, on the surface, didn't necessarily look like abuse at all. My father’s words show the subtleties of coercive control: how power hides behind reason, and how “calmness” becomes a tool to silence. My sister’s letter, in contrast, exposes the cracks — a quiet rebellion against the narrative he’s tried to write for all of us.  I also reflect on the story of Elizabeth Smart, whose survival reveals how manipulation and psychological control can completely alter a person’s sense of reality.  This episode asks: when someone controls the story, how do you reclaim your voice?

⚠️ Content Note: This episode discusses sensitive themes, including abuse, suicide, and family conflict, and may not be suitable for all listeners. If you or someone you know is struggling, call or text 988 in the U.S. for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline.

🎵 Music Credit: Moonlight Sonata, performed by Paul Pitman