SEASON 2, EPISODE 3: ACCEPTANCE

This episode is about accepting the negative beliefs you have about yourself. By revisiting this journal entry, I realised that I still experience the same negative thoughts today that I wrote about in the journal entry over 10 years ago, even though I am not in academia anymore. I came to the conclusion that academia was only part of the problem—the other part being fundamental beliefs deeper inside me.

I revisit a journal entry I wrote in April 2014. I was well into the 3rd year of my post doc at this point. I was in Amsterdam airport, on my way back to the UK for a conference.

I reflect on how much I used to love going to conferences as a PhD student; the value of conferences and community; dealing with negative beliefs like “I’m not good enough” through acceptance, avoidance, and/or overcompensation; having the same negative thoughts today, even though I left academia (maybe academia was never the problem???); developing my own philosophy about work; recording the good times; and rising tensions with my boss.

Timestamps:

[00:00] Intro

[02:55] Journal entry

[07:44] First conference I attended as a postdoc

[08:33] Getting further away from a sense of community

[09:29] Acceptance, avoidance, and overcompensation

[12:17] Reframing the narrative for “healthy” acceptance

[12:59] I still have the same negative self-beliefs about myself today

[14:32] Developing my own philosophy on what was important to me

[15:44] It’s good to take the time to record the positive moments

[16:10] Things were getting tense with my boss

[16:38] Outro

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