1. Anyone having children for personal pleasure is treating them like pets and priming them for apostasy.

1.1. One of the most popular reasons people have kids today is because they want to experience heart-warming moments and memories w/them, live vicariously through them and feel some sense of validation or acceptance because of them. Or, if you are too weird and controlling to have real friends, then you have lots of kids whom you force to be your friends and like what you like and do what you do. In either case, these kinds of people are having children for the purpose of serving their selfish personal pleasures.

1.2. This however is not the reason God gave us the ability to have kids - but pets. Pets exist for the purpose of serving our pleasure – but never kids.

1.3. The only reason God wants Christians to become parents is the same reason the military has drill sergeants: to transform those kids into battlefield-ready soldiers fiercely loyal to their commander in chief and ready to give their lives for their comrades and country. In this case, soldiers on the spiritual battlefield, fiercely loyal to the Commander-in-Chief of the armies of heaven, Jesus, ready to give their lives for their comrades (i.e., their covenant brothers and sisters) and His kingdom (or country on earth), the church (1Co 7:26-35). How these verses relate to children: 1) one of the main purposes of getting married is to have children - especially in biblical times when children were vital to a family’s wealth and health (Psa 127:1-5). 2) like Paul’s original audience, we too are living in that period of time just before Christ’s return (them = 60s-70 AD, us = 2025-2030) when it will be exceptionally difficult to be a Christian - and much more, responsible for the souls of others (i.e., a wife or children) (v26 “present distress” = Morality is at an all-time low and persecution of the godly at an all-time high [2Ti 3:1-12]; v28 w/vv32-35) = Wives and children create “trouble” which distracts from the “devotion to the Lord” we must possess to get to heaven. This includes the temptation to focus on pleasing them rather than pleasing the Lord – i.e., establishing one’s home and practice according to His “interests” rather than theirs and the world’s – which will be even more important when the time we possess to get the job done has been “shortened” due to Christ’s imminent return. Hence (vv29-31) = No time to focus on selfish agendas – including those we may possess with respect to a wife or children. IOW: spiritual transformation must not only be the dominant driver in all family time, decisions and planning, but practiced with a sense of urgency (e.g., military boot camp: 8-12 weeks to turn a civilian into a soldier).

1.4. How you know this is your purpose for having kids: 1) your pleasure in having them is directly proportionate to your faithfulness in fulfilling your calling as a parent. 2) your love and joy toward them is based entirely on their performance (Phi 2:2, 16-18, 19-22 [w/1Ti 1:2 w/2Ti 1:2-5]; 2Jo 1:4; The Father’s love for Jesus is based on performance - Joh 10:17).

1.5. Why treating children like pets (i.e., having them for personal pleasure) primes them for apostasy = Your selfishness will not only be the thing they learn most from you but what drives their already selfish hearts further away from loving and serving God. 

2. Our salvation depends on us caring more about the preservation of justice/equity than the preservation of lives -most especially the lives of our apostate children.

2.1. (Deu 16:20) = God demands that we care more about the preservation of justice/equity than the preservation of life.

2.2. (Deu 19:21) = The sign that a Christian cares more about the preservation of justice/equity than the preservation of life is the absence of compassion (“you shall not show pity”) and compromise (“life for life, eye for eye, [etc.,]”) they show toward those guilty of serious crimes (e.g., malicious witness) – which would therefore most certainly include the apostate.

2.3. Why I say our salvation depends on us caring more about justice: because practicing justice/righteousness (i.e., God’s Law – or His laws of equity, laws which create fair treatment for all) is what identifies us as the children of God – as those who love God and others – which are the two greatest commandments (or practices necessary to salvation) ([Matt 22:37-40 w/Rom 13:8-10] w/1Jo 3:7-11; 1Jo 5:1-3).

2.4. Point (then) Not To Miss: God cares (and requires us to care) more about protecting and promoting love for all people (including Himself) than preserving the lives of those who might die in the process (especially those who are apostate and deserve it).

2.5. The only reasons therefore a person would be inclined to generate feelings of compassion or compromise toward the apostate (e.g., crying and expressing pity for them, feeling sorry for them, wanting to relive fond memories of them before they went apostate, or questioning the integrity of God’s words) is they are ignorant of – or don’t care about how unloving, inequitable, ungrateful and utterly treasonous their behavior is to God and others (two examples):

2.5.1. (e.g., unloving) (Heb 10:27-30, [v29] “trampled under foot”) = Idiomatic reference to dehumanization (Psa 56:1), the crime of treating someone as less than human, to take away their human dignity. In this case, the Son of God (their former marriage partner), inferring that the crime of dehumanization was also sexual in nature. “treated as unclean the blood of the [marriage] covenant by which he was sanctified” = Though adultery is a sexual crime that would qualify as treating the marriage covenant and the marital gift of Christ’s justifying blood as “unclean”, it is not by itself a dehumanizing act. The only way Christ could be dehumanized through such adultery is if His body were also somehow involved and violated through the crime. Spousal rape or forcing one’s spouse to function as a prostitute are the types of sexual crimes within marriage that qualify also as dehumanizing acts. Hence the reason the author of Hebrews refers to it as also “insult(ing) (or outraging) the Spirit of grace” versus simply grieving or quenching Him (Eph 4:30; 1Th 5:19).

This is why the author can also speak of those committing so heinous a crime as being worthy of an even “severer punishment” than the apostate of the Old Covenant (those who had “set aside the Law of Moses” -vv28-29).

The Point (then) Not To Miss: those committing apostasy under the NC are viewed by God as forcing Christ (their marital spouse) to be dehumanized through rape or prostitution. What then does that say about our declared love for Christ if we feel any level of sympathy or sorrow toward the apostate – those guilty of dehumanizing Him through rape and prostitution?         

2.5.2. (e.g., inequitable) (“I am remembering/crying/feeling sorry for/desiring the non-apostate child in the past” w/Eze 18:21-24).

2.5.3. (e.g., ungrateful) (Num 11:1-6 [Our past life w/the wicked in Egypt was better than our life w/God now bc of what had to be left behind] w/10 w/16-20) = You ungratefulness reveals your rejection of God. In this light consider the heart of the truly grateful (Mat 13:44-46).

2.5.4. (e.g., utterly treasonous) (2Sa 18:32-19:8) = You commit treason when you cry for the loss of those disloyal but do not/would not shed tears for the loss of those who are loyal. By your tears you demonstrate not only partiality toward your son, but that you value the life of the wicked more than the righteous. The same can be said about parents crying for their apostate children. Why are they not instead shedding tears for Christ – our loyal and righteous God Whose death was wasted by their wicked child? Not only that, but if like David, they express willingness to die for their child (2Sa 18:33 “Would I had died instead of you!”), then are they not also implying that their child is worth more than the death of Christ already given on their behalf? Such actions reveal a level of treason more severe than that of David. 

3. Though viewed as criminal by the world, fierce loyalty to replacing blood children, parents and siblings with spiritual, parents and siblings (i.e., those who do will of God) is imperative to receiving eternal life.

3.1. (Mat 19:29-30 w/Mar 3:21 w/31-35)

3.2. BTW: As Christians, our new spiritual family (the covenant community/church) is the greatest family in all of human history. Consider: 1) Who our God is (the God on top), 2) who are relatives and ancestors are (including Jesus, David, Samuel, Joshua, Moses and Abraham – the greatest warriors, kings and leaders the world has ever known) 3) the great things our people have accomplished (even in the face of incredible adversity [Heb 11:38 “men of whom the world was not worthy”]), 4) the great traditions and stories that have been passed down (we have our own family book where many of them are recorded). 5) the incredible inheritance we have waiting for us (Rom 8:32; Eph 1:18; 1Pe 1:4 w/18).

3.3. Reasons some Christians still desire to be a part of – or loyal to, their crappy and corrupt blood families or family members (including those who are God-haters and/or apostate): 1) they fail see to how great their new family and inheritance really are, 2) they have selfish agendas which can only be fulfilled thru continued connection to blood family (Luk 9:59-62; e.g., status, approval, money), 3) they like the “unconditional love” of their blood family which allows them to continue in sinful practices w/o being judged/getting in trouble, 4) they don’t realize the apostasy they may be committing by their refusal to separate from them (2Jo 1:9-11). 

4. The apostasy of a child, can be the event that locks their parent(s) into the permanency of their own apostasy or the permanency of their own faithfulness.

4.1. We are self-programmed robots = Our interests, preferences, attractions, desires – and ultimately who or what we truly believe and trust are all “programmed by” - or the result of what we are reinforcing through our speech, thoughts, practices or habits (our brain is listening to us more than anyone else). Which means if a parent is continually expressing emotions of pity and love/affection for themselves or the apostate (e.g., being sad rather than mad, crying/mourning over the apostate, crying as a means of feeling sorry for themselves) or using language that is affectionate (e.g., “I miss my little boy”, “I remember when they were so sweet” “I would give my life to have them back”) or calls God’s Word or the church’s judgment into question (“I am confused about Hosea 4:14”) then that person will start to feel confused - and eventually become convinced that the apostate child has been wronged by the church and/or God (“God is a monster”) and will go apostate or cause other children in the home to go apostate who (thru their observance of their parents) lose their faith in God.

4.2. Hence the reason it is more imperative than ever that those parents be practicing trust in the foreign over the familiar – or replacement of what feels familiar with what feels foreign. They need to immediately and permanently replace their former thoughts, memories and feelings of love for that child with what God commands: thoughts of hate and desire for their apostate child’s personal demise (Psa 139:21-24; Psa 69:22-24). Though at first such actions will feel wrong (foreign), our feelings will eventually recalibrate and reinforce our new thinking. Again, we are self-programmed robots. This is what it means to walk by faith and not by sight (2Co 4:18) and (once more) absolutely imperative to protecting ourselves from the permanency of apostasy (from also falling away from our Savior) (Heb 6:6) = Their actions [falling away] has completely corrupted the new creation/spirit given at their baptism w/o the possibility of repair or redemption. IOW: they have spoiled the gift/grace purchased at a heavy price by Christ [crucifixion and open shame] – a price He will not pay again on their behalf – which means they are now permanently locked in apostasy.

4.3. Though suffering the loss of a child in apostasy is an awful thing for a parent to experience, it may not be without its own silver lining. God has been known to use such events to lock His people into another form of permanency, the permanency of faithfulness (Gen 22:1-18 w/Gen 18:19) = The promises spoken to Abe are no longer conditional but guaranteed b/c he has locked himself into a state of faithfulness w/no chance of unfaithfulness/apostasy.

CLOSING CONTEMPLATION: What level of test would you joyfully and eagerly be willing to endure if passing it would lock you into a state a faithfulness that guaranteed both your immunity to future unfaithfulness and your place in heaven?