You have had multiple times to believe and receive the Lord Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and Savior BEFORE you die! The thing is you refuse to believe and put faith in Him all because of things you have heard but not because He failed you. You call on Him when you get in trouble and you want Him to help you (and He does). Here is the trouble for you, if you die before you put your faith; real faith; life changing faith in Him it will be too late to reverse an eternal, life changing decision. Give your life to the Lord today!!!