So what’s going to happen when AGI finally shows up in our little cyber sandbox?

The dream (according to every shiny LinkedIn post and vendor deck) is beautiful: the AI will do all the vuln management, triage every alert at 3 a.m., magically contain the ransomware before it spreads, and then rebuild the entire compromised environment while we’re still in the bathroom taking our “relieving action.”

You wanted AGI with consciousness.Here you go.Full package.Feelings included.And guess what?Feelings make everything worse.