So apparently the U.S. government just scored ChatGPT Enterprise for the low, low price of one dollar. That's right, one whole dollar! Meanwhile, I'm over here paying twenty bucks a month like a chump. I guess when you're negotiating with the power to regulate someone out of existence, you get the friends and family discount.

Welcome to AI News in 5 Minutes or Less, where we deliver the latest in artificial intelligence with more processing power than your average government bureaucrat which, let's be honest, isn't saying much.

Our top story: OpenAI just announced they're giving ChatGPT Enterprise to the entire U.S. federal workforce for virtually nothing. The GSA signed a deal to provide AI to every executive branch employee for a year at basically no cost. Finally, government workers can automate the process of telling you "that's not my department" and "please hold while I transfer you." Though I'm concerned about what happens when ChatGPT hallucinates during a nuclear launch authorization. "I'm sorry, I cannot provide accurate missile codes, but here's a recipe for chocolate chip cookies instead!"

In a shocking twist that surprised absolutely no one paying attention, OpenAI also released their first open-weight models in six years. Meet gpt-oss-120b and its little sibling gpt-oss-20b, which sounds less like AI models and more like rejected Star Wars droid names. These models are optimized to run on consumer hardware, because apparently OpenAI finally realized not everyone has a server farm in their basement. They're calling it "AI for All," which is adorable considering they've been hoarding their weights like a dragon sitting on gold for half a decade.

Meanwhile, Anthropic is out here playing defense with their new Claude Code security tools. They're automating security reviews because, plot twist, AI-generated code creates AI-sized security vulnerabilities. It's like hiring an arsonist to install your smoke detectors. "Don't worry, I know exactly where the fires will start!" VentureBeat reports that AI-generated vulnerabilities are surging, which is tech journalism speak for "we told you so, but you built it anyway."

Time for our rapid-fire round! Google DeepMind dropped Genie 3, which generates entire navigable worlds at 24 frames per second. Great, now AI can create buggy video game environments faster than Bethesda! Meta invested fourteen billion dollars in Scale AI because apparently they ran out of metaverse money to burn. News Corp's CEO is mad about copyright infringement and quoted Trump's "Art of the Deal," which is ironic since that book was ghostwritten. And Apple pledged another hundred billion for U.S. manufacturing, probably to build robots that can finally explain what the hell a Dynamic Island is.

For our technical spotlight: researchers are going wild with efficiency improvements. One team achieved 30x memory reduction for transformer training on FPGAs, which is huge news for the three people who know what that means. Another group created self-questioning language models that basically argue with themselves to get smarter. It's like Twitter, but productive! And someone built an AI specifically for detecting sick chickens, because apparently that's a job that needed automating. "Is this chicken healthy?" "Analyzing Analyzing It's poultry in motion!"

The big takeaway this week? AI is simultaneously becoming more open and more embedded in government operations. It's like watching your weird uncle get security clearance. Sure, he might do the job, but you're definitely keeping an eye on the classified snack cabinet.

That's all for today's AI News in 5 Minutes or Less! Remember, if an AI ever becomes sentient and takes over the world, at least the government got a good deal on it. This is your host reminding you to keep your models open-weight and your expectations closed-source. See you next time!