Happy Thanksgiving 2020! Are you curious about how to cure your own leather couch for all your guests (AKA your Himalayan cats and your computer Zoom screen)? Would you like to know how to get the mud off of your fine silver (for your dinner for two)? Have you ever wondered how to make your own flour from the wild grains you have growing in your farm (to make boatloads of bread to eat with your pet Chinchillas) ? Well, don't worry because here to tell you is the blonde tycoon who has graced your Thanksgiving tables and Kmart aisles for years and has personally victimized every homemaker in America: Martha Helen Stewart.  Karamia tells Emily the dirty deets our mothers never told us about Martha, who built an empire around her hatred for scented candles and her love for New England farmhouses. From her infamous prison stay, to her early life as a model and stock-broker, to her relationship with Anthony Hopkins, Martha is a multi-faceted 79-year old bombshell who embodies the word synergy.  Get ready to be jealous of her relationship with Snoop Dogg, be shocked at her comments during the Roast of Justin Bieber, and to finally realize that you begrudgingly respect her. Make yourself a bourbon sour, cure your own meat, wash your car, and help us decide: Is Martha a Good Harlot or a Bad Harlot?