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Welcome back to the Ashlee Jaine Show, ladies, I am your host and guide, Ashlee, Jaine, sharing advice and actionable tips on self-love, self growth, family marriage, life and pretty much everything else in between. If this is your very first podcast episode with me, I would encourage you to hit that subscribe button and make sure that you are notified. When all of my new shows come out, I put out a new episode every single week and try to fill them with golden nuggets of information for you to use to help show up as your very best self on an everyday basis. And that is exactly what we are going to do in this episode today. Today we are talking about assets and liabilities. So full disclosure before we dive in, I am a huge fan of personal finance. It's actually become a passion of mine because I really enjoy being financially smart or financially educated and making good sound financial decisions, both short term and long term. And it's something that I've really studied a lot on and I feel like I don't necessarily talk a lot about because there's a big part of me who doesn't feel like I have the place or the knowledge to tell people what to do with their money. So I really try to just, you know, keep that sort of advice to a minimum. But we are actually not going to be talking about money at all today.

We are going to be talking about you and your relationships and how you show up in them. And let's just be clear on what the definition of an asset and a liability is. An asset is something that creates value or generates value or brings in value. And a liability is essentially the opposite of that, especially in the terms or in the regards in which we are going to be discussing today. So someone who is not contributing value or providing value in a relationship or honestly, just in this world in general, and as unfortunate as it may be, there are definitely people who are more of a liability than an asset. And most likely you are related to some or, you know, some individuals who you can identify as a liability. But it's not necessarily going to be all about them in this episode. I really want to focus on you, especially because I want each and every single one of you to be considered an asset in every single relationship and in every single capacity that you can be. Now, in order to be considered an asset, you really have to make sure that you are coming in strong to the relationship or to whatever good or service or whatever scenario in your life that may be. So in order to show up and to provide value, you need to be giving something to the relationship.

You need to be giving yourself to your job. You need to be giving yourself to your charity work or, you know, the causes that you're passionate about. Whatever it may be, you have to be providing value in some way and value can be honestly, it can be anything. The exchange of value is only as limited as you define it. You can provide value by providing information. You can provide value by providing positivity. You can provide value by being a good listener. When your friend or a relative or whoever this relationship is with needs someone to talk to. There are so many ways that you can show up and provide value in each and every single day of your life. And really, I would just encourage you to try to identify it all throughout the day, the ways that you show up and you already provide value, because chances are if you're listening to this podcast, you're already someone who's contributing to the relationship, who is contributing to the world in a positive way because you are on your way to becoming the very best version of yourself. And that's why you're here and that's why you're listening to this podcast and that's why you are focusing on personal development and self growth. So try to take mental note of the ways that you show up and you provide value in your job.

Try to take mental note of the way that you show up and you provide value in. Your relationships, does your value look like taking the initiative to spearhead a very important project at work? Does your value look like putting the needs of your children before your own? Does your value look like giving someone a polite smile when you can tell that they're having a hard day? There are so many different ways and so many different things that you can do to provide value in this world. And I honestly believe that this is just a big part of of reaching your full potential in this life and of touching the lives and of doing all of the things that you and your soul were set out to do. Because I do believe that we are all here for a purpose. And I think that once you are aware of the ways that you provide value in the ways that you show up in your relationships and in your job and in your life, you are one step closer to doing all of those things, to reaching your potential, to living out your purpose, to contributing to the world in a positive way. Now, on the flip side of that, let's talk about liabilities for a second. Now, I personally know liabilities and I know that, you know, liabilities to analyze your relationships, analyze your interactions, analyze your current roles in life.

Are they a liability or are they providing value? Are they lighting you up and making you feel fulfilled or are they draining you? Are they bringing you down or are they doing the opposite of providing value? Now, I actually admittedly did look up the definition to a liability online and it basically says risk or hazard. Right. So you can think about people as a risk or a hazard if you'd like a risk or hazard to your mental well-being, a risk or a hazard to your physical health, maybe it's someone who encourages you to do things that you know you shouldn't do, like drink and drive or smoke cigarettes or, you know, whatever that may look like for you. Maybe it is a very stressful job that is very demanding and taxing on not only your brain, but also your body as well. Maybe you're drinking way too much coffee, way too much Starbucks to stay awake and get the job done. And it's taking its toll on you. That is a liability. Those people are a liability. They are a liability in the sense that they are not providing you value. They are not helping you achieve your fullest potential or live out your purpose or do good in this world. If you put together a piece of paper and draw a line down the middle and you have one side on the left that says asset and you have one side on the right that says liability, and you go down and add things that are current in your life, current roles that you play, current relationships that you have.

It's very easy to categorize those relationships in those roles. On the left side, you may have, you know, your church. If you are religious, that is an asset because that provides you with value, that fills you up, that helps you reach your potential, that helps you live your purpose, that helps you put good out. And the world on the opposite side of that, you may have and I've talked about this before, toxic relationships and how to handle them. It's one of my older episodes. You can go back and take a listen to it, because there's lots of really good information in there. But on the other side of that, maybe you have a sibling or maybe you have a friend who does nothing but complain and vent all the time. And they're very negative and they bring you down. And any time that you're around them, it's just nothing but a soapbox of everything that's going wrong in their life. And as much as you love them and you want to listen to them and be positive and help them, you can only do so much without them helping themselves.

So maybe that is a specific person in your life that you consider a liability. And it's very taxing. It's very taxing relationship on you mentally. I'm sure as you are listening to this podcast right now, people are starting to pop into your mind. Things are starting to pop into your mind. Is there something that you're doing that's not filling you? Maybe it wants to. Maybe it doesn't anymore. Maybe it's no longer serving you. That is now a liability. Things can always go from liability to asset, an asset to liability and vice versa. It just depends on where you're at and who you are at this point in your life. So don't think that once once you put someone in that asset category that they can't soon become a liability because that is not true. And don't you think that just because they're a liability right now, that friend is going through a really hard time? They could be an asset at some point in the future. It's not a relationship or severing. Maybe they just really need to get all of the. Stuff out, but you don't necessarily have to be the person that they get it out to. So just keep that in mind. Things can flip flop. They can go back and forth and you can flip flop as well. Maybe or maybe you're on the liability side right now for some people, maybe you're the friend that's showing up and complaining and venting and, you know, standing on your soapbox, talking for the entire conversation, having a monologue rather than a dialogue that's not you providing value to your friend or that person in that relationship.

But you can you can change that. You can figure out how you can provide value in that relationship. In fact, I think all of your I would say your top five or top 10 relationships between friends and family just go through that list, ask how you can provide more value in that relationship, and you will honestly be surprised at the value that is reciprocated, meaning they are going to then provide value for you if you start showing up more for the people that you love. And in those relationships, they are going to start showing up more for you. It's funny, it's almost like a symbiotic relationship where you have to put in the work and then they will match it. And unfortunately, there is going to be a person from time to time who doesn't do that. But that is not on you. That's nothing about you. That is definitely more so about them. And if you feel like your energy and your value isn't being matched, they may be more of a liability. That's a sure sign that they are not necessarily interested or capable of showing up and matching you and providing value in your relationship that way.

Now, value looks different for everyone. What you consider value is going to be very different than what they consider value. But let them and you show up in the ways that you can and in the ways that are strengths to you. So, for example, I have a friend who is an amazing gift giver as she is so thoughtful and everything is just so planned out. Like every holiday you can think of. She does something fun and something cute, some sort of gifts for, you know, not just me or my husband, but also for our kids, too. And it's I love that about her. And honestly, I wish that I had that in me, but I don't. Gifts are like the bottom of my love languages. It's like number five for me. I'm not a gift person, especially if I feel pressured to have to give a gift. That's just not who I am. Like Christmas. No thanks. I'm not going to hire somebody. I get just because there's a holiday that says that I have to. So anyways, that's how she shows up and she provides value. That's how she shows the importance and the relevance of the relationship or our relationship to her. But I, on the other hand, can't do that. That's not how I show up.

I'm more of a words of affirmation. I'm going to tell you that you're amazing and then I'm so thankful for you and that I'm so happy to have you in my life. And I'm so, you know, proud of you for X, Y, Z. And you're doing wonderful at this. And that's who I am. That's how I show value. Words of affirmation is like a big one for me because I am the type of person who loves to inspire and encourage. So that's who I am. That's how I show value in that relationship. So just because someone is showing you value in a different way than how you show value, you still need to honor and respect that and most definitely acknowledge it because not everyone is going to show up and provide value in the exact same way. Now, all of this aside, I really hope that you take the time to make a mental note or a mental list of the assets and the liabilities in your life in this can be anything from your husband and your job to your volunteer commitments or your. Daily workout routine, just take note of how it is making you feel, how it is showing up and providing value for you, how it is serving you at this time and take it from there, you don't have to necessarily take any action.

You can leave everything just as it is. But at least in the back of your mind, you'll know next time that friend goes to vent or that job wears you down. Hey, this is a liability in my life. And maybe from there you can start to get a strategy together, a game plan. This would be a great time if you have people, especially in relationships, to go back and listen to the How to Handle Toxic Relationships podcast episode that I did. But at the end of the day, I would just encourage and inspire you to make sure that you are showing value in all capacities of your life in all regards, and really just focus on, you know, reaching your potential, touching those lives, living out your purpose, all of those good things, putting putting goodness and kindness and positivity and productivity out into the world. However, it is that you show up, just make sure you're doing that. And I can promise that it will come back to you tenfold. Thank you so much for listening, ladies. I really appreciate you and honor you for taking the time to tune in and work on becoming the best version of yourself today. If this episode was inspiring to you, I would encourage you to share it and help me get the good word out to other women, just like you. And I will catch you on the next episode.