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Are You Surviving… or Are You Thriving?
By: Teri Arvesú González
I asked myself that exact question when I made a major career change.A bold one.A scary one.A “what am I doing?” one.
And I’ll be honest: I’m still in the transition.
Which is precisely why I want to write this—for anyone who needs language, science, and strategy to name what’s happening inside them… and decide what to do next.
Because survival mode is sneaky.It can look like stability.It can look like achievement.It can look like “I’m doing fine.”
But thriving is different.
Thriving is building a life and career that stays valuable over time—not just one that looks good right now.
Survival Mode Can Pay Well (But Still Cost You Everything)
Here’s the part most people don’t talk about:
You can be making great money…and still be in survival mode.
You can be collecting a six-figure salary…and quietly falling behind.
Because surviving is often about maintaining what you have.
But thriving is about becoming who you need to be next.
Let’s make it real:
If your job pays you well but doesn’t require you to evolve…If you’re rewarded for doing what you already know…If you’re stuck executing yesterday’s playbook…
Then what happens when the world changes—again?
What’s the point of making six figures today if the skills you’re building aren’t going to protect you tomorrow?
The hard truth:
Your paycheck is not proof of your future relevance.
And the older I get, the more I believe this:
It is our job—no matter where we work—to stay employable, stay valuable, and stay relevant.
A company can give you a role.But it cannot give you long-term security.
That part is on you.
Survival Mode is “Short-Term Smart”
Survival mode has a purpose. It’s not evil. It’s protective.
Your brain is wired for one job first:
Keep you alive.
Not fulfilled.Not expanded.Not visionary.Alive.
That’s why survival mode prioritizes:
* certainty
* control
* routine
* immediate reward
* avoiding risk
* “don’t mess this up”
It’s caveman logic.
Your brain is basically saying:
“We’ve found food. Don’t wander.”Even if the “food” is a job that’s slowly shrinking you.
Survival mode loves:
* autopilot
* predictability
* comfort
* staying in your lane
* repeating what worked before
And to be fair… that strategy works.
For a while.
But it won’t build long-term success.
Thriving Requires a Different Operating System
Thriving is not hustle.Thriving is not “positive vibes.”Thriving is not pretending you’re okay.
Thriving is a biological state.
When you’re thriving, your nervous system is regulated enough that you can access the parts of the brain responsible for:
* strategic thinking
* planning
* creativity
* problem-solving
* emotional regulation
* adaptability
* learning
* innovation
* leadership
This is your prefrontal cortex at work—the part of your brain that helps you think long-term and stay flexible.
But here’s the catch:
When your brain senses threat (even social threat, like looking stupid, failing, being judged), it shifts control away from the prefrontal cortex and toward survival circuitry.
That’s when the brain prioritizes:
* speed over depth
* defense over possibility
* immediate relief over long-term growth
In other words:
Survival mode makes you reactive.Thriving mode makes you responsive.
And the difference between those two states can shape your entire career trajectory.
The Real Danger: Survival Mode Shrinks Your Future
Let’s name the danger plainly:
Survival mode will keep you busy…but not necessarily building.
It makes you look productive—while quietly stalling your evolution.
And it doesn’t just shrink your skills.
It shrinks your circle.
Because survival mode has a very specific bias:
It prioritizes urgent tasks over long-term assets.And relationships are a long-term asset.
Here’s how survival mode sneaks into careers:
1) You optimize for comfort instead of challenge
You become the best at what you already know…and stop becoming the person who can solve new problems.
2) You confuse stability with safety
But in today’s world, “stable” is often just “not updated yet.”
3) You delay learning because you’re “too busy”
And the longer you delay it, the more intimidating change becomes.
4) You don’t build relationships because you’re always in task mode
This one is sneaky because it feels responsible.
You tell yourself:
* “I’ll network when things calm down.”
* “I don’t have time for coffee chats.”
* “I just need to focus on delivering.”
* “I’ll reach out after this quarter.”
But “after this quarter” turns into… a year.And suddenly you realize you’ve built a career around output—but not around people.
And people are how opportunities move.
People are how you stay visible when you’re not in the room.People are how you find new lanes before you need one.People are how you learn what’s coming before it hits you.
When you don’t build relationships, you’re not just missing community.
You’re missing:
* early access to information
* advocates when decisions get made
* collaborators who stretch your thinking
* mentors who help you level up faster
* sponsors who put your name on tables you’re not sitting at yet
Survival mode convinces you that relationships are optional.
Thriving understands relationships are infrastructure.
5) You don’t feel the risk… until the market shows you
New tools. New systems. New expectations.And suddenly what made you valuable yesterday isn’t enough.
That’s the trap.
Survival mode protects the present…while sacrificing the future.
Growth Mindset: The Thriving Skill That Changes Everything
This is where growth mindset matters—not as a motivational poster, but as brain science.
A growth mindset (popularized by psychologist Carol Dweck) is the belief that abilities can be developed through effort, strategies, and feedback—not fixed traits you either have or don’t.
But the deeper benefit is this:
Growth mindset reduces threat.
When you believe you can learn, change feels less like danger and more like development.
Growth mindset shifts the inner narrative from:
* “If I don’t know it, I’m behind.”to
* “If I don’t know it yet, I can learn it.”
That “yet” is not small.
That “yet” is freedom.
Because when the brain feels safe enough to learn, it re-engages the prefrontal cortex—your thriving brain.
And suddenly you can do what survival mode cannot:
* think bigger
* tolerate discomfort
* experiment without panic
* evolve without shame
What I Tell My Students (And I Still Tell Myself)
When I teach, I say this constantly:
What you’re learning today does not mean that tool will work forever.
The world changes too fast for that kind of confidence.
And here’s the paradox:
The earlier you learn this, the less scary change becomes.
Because you stop making it mean:
* you failed
* you’re behind
* you’re not smart
* you missed your chance
Instead, you start treating change as a normal part of staying relevant.
You stop fearing the unknown…and you start fearing stagnation.
Not from panic.
From clarity.
How to Discern: Survival Mode vs Thriving Mode
This is the part that matters most—discernment.
Because the goal is not to “never be in survival mode.”
The goal is to recognize when you are…and stop building your whole life from that place.
Signs you’re in Survival Mode
* You’re avoiding change even though you know you’re outgrowing the situation
* You’re staying because leaving feels too risky
* You feel constantly behind, even when you’re doing well
* You’re overly focused on proving, performing, pleasing
* You’re learning less, not more
* You’re getting paid, but shrinking inside
* You’re “fine”… but you’re not expanding
Signs you’re in Thriving Mode
* You’re making choices aligned with long-term growth
* You’re building skills that will matter in two years, not just today
* You’re thinking in outcomes, not tasks
* You can tolerate discomfort without spiraling
* You’re curious again
* You’re investing in yourself consistently
* You feel stretched… but alive
Thriving isn’t easier.
It’s just honest.
The TAG Collab Takeaway
If you take nothing else from this, take this:
Survival mode isn’t failure.It’s a signal.
A signal that your brain is protecting you.
But protection is not the same as progress.
And long-term success—the kind that makes you resilient, relevant, and genuinely fulfilled—requires a skill most people never build:
the ability to notice what state you’re operating from… and choose differently.
So I’ll ask you again:
Are you surviving… or are you thriving?
Because if you’re surviving, don’t shame yourself.
Just don’t build a whole decade there.
You deserve a future that doesn’t just pay you…
It grows you.
About the Author: Teri Arvesu Gonzalez
Teri Arvesu Gonzalez is a 15-time Emmy® award-winning media executive and the founder of The TAG Collab, a consultancy and platform dedicated to helping mission-driven companies align purpose, brand, and strategy from the inside out.
Formerly the Senior Vice President of Social Impact and Sustainability at TelevisaUnivision, Teri has spent over two decades at the intersection of journalism, civic tech, and corporate social responsibility. A recognized expert in navigating brand resilience and long-term value creation, her work focuses on moving organizations beyond “performative storytelling” into the “Reality Era” of business—where specific, measurable data and operational integrity drive growth.
A third-generation American and veteran News Director, Teri is a frequent speaker on CivicTech, AI in journalism, and the math of win-win leadership. Through The TAG Collab, she provides strategic frameworks that help brands stay relevant to Gen Z and Gen Alpha by prioritizing transparency and “Value Signaling” over traditional marketing buzzwords.
📌 Connect with Teri:
* Podcast: The TAG Collab
* TikTok
This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thetagcollab.substack.com/subscribe
View all episodes
By The TAG CollabBy: Teri Arvesú González
I asked myself that exact question when I made a major career change.A bold one.A scary one.A “what am I doing?” one.
And I’ll be honest: I’m still in the transition.
Which is precisely why I want to write this—for anyone who needs language, science, and strategy to name what’s happening inside them… and decide what to do next.
Because survival mode is sneaky.It can look like stability.It can look like achievement.It can look like “I’m doing fine.”
But thriving is different.
Thriving is building a life and career that stays valuable over time—not just one that looks good right now.
Survival Mode Can Pay Well (But Still Cost You Everything)
Here’s the part most people don’t talk about:
You can be making great money…and still be in survival mode.
You can be collecting a six-figure salary…and quietly falling behind.
Because surviving is often about maintaining what you have.
But thriving is about becoming who you need to be next.
Let’s make it real:
If your job pays you well but doesn’t require you to evolve…If you’re rewarded for doing what you already know…If you’re stuck executing yesterday’s playbook…
Then what happens when the world changes—again?
What’s the point of making six figures today if the skills you’re building aren’t going to protect you tomorrow?
The hard truth:
Your paycheck is not proof of your future relevance.
And the older I get, the more I believe this:
It is our job—no matter where we work—to stay employable, stay valuable, and stay relevant.
A company can give you a role.But it cannot give you long-term security.
That part is on you.
Survival Mode is “Short-Term Smart”
Survival mode has a purpose. It’s not evil. It’s protective.
Your brain is wired for one job first:
Keep you alive.
Not fulfilled.Not expanded.Not visionary.Alive.
That’s why survival mode prioritizes:
* certainty
* control
* routine
* immediate reward
* avoiding risk
* “don’t mess this up”
It’s caveman logic.
Your brain is basically saying:
“We’ve found food. Don’t wander.”Even if the “food” is a job that’s slowly shrinking you.
Survival mode loves:
* autopilot
* predictability
* comfort
* staying in your lane
* repeating what worked before
And to be fair… that strategy works.
For a while.
But it won’t build long-term success.
Thriving Requires a Different Operating System
Thriving is not hustle.Thriving is not “positive vibes.”Thriving is not pretending you’re okay.
Thriving is a biological state.
When you’re thriving, your nervous system is regulated enough that you can access the parts of the brain responsible for:
* strategic thinking
* planning
* creativity
* problem-solving
* emotional regulation
* adaptability
* learning
* innovation
* leadership
This is your prefrontal cortex at work—the part of your brain that helps you think long-term and stay flexible.
But here’s the catch:
When your brain senses threat (even social threat, like looking stupid, failing, being judged), it shifts control away from the prefrontal cortex and toward survival circuitry.
That’s when the brain prioritizes:
* speed over depth
* defense over possibility
* immediate relief over long-term growth
In other words:
Survival mode makes you reactive.Thriving mode makes you responsive.
And the difference between those two states can shape your entire career trajectory.
The Real Danger: Survival Mode Shrinks Your Future
Let’s name the danger plainly:
Survival mode will keep you busy…but not necessarily building.
It makes you look productive—while quietly stalling your evolution.
And it doesn’t just shrink your skills.
It shrinks your circle.
Because survival mode has a very specific bias:
It prioritizes urgent tasks over long-term assets.And relationships are a long-term asset.
Here’s how survival mode sneaks into careers:
1) You optimize for comfort instead of challenge
You become the best at what you already know…and stop becoming the person who can solve new problems.
2) You confuse stability with safety
But in today’s world, “stable” is often just “not updated yet.”
3) You delay learning because you’re “too busy”
And the longer you delay it, the more intimidating change becomes.
4) You don’t build relationships because you’re always in task mode
This one is sneaky because it feels responsible.
You tell yourself:
* “I’ll network when things calm down.”
* “I don’t have time for coffee chats.”
* “I just need to focus on delivering.”
* “I’ll reach out after this quarter.”
But “after this quarter” turns into… a year.And suddenly you realize you’ve built a career around output—but not around people.
And people are how opportunities move.
People are how you stay visible when you’re not in the room.People are how you find new lanes before you need one.People are how you learn what’s coming before it hits you.
When you don’t build relationships, you’re not just missing community.
You’re missing:
* early access to information
* advocates when decisions get made
* collaborators who stretch your thinking
* mentors who help you level up faster
* sponsors who put your name on tables you’re not sitting at yet
Survival mode convinces you that relationships are optional.
Thriving understands relationships are infrastructure.
5) You don’t feel the risk… until the market shows you
New tools. New systems. New expectations.And suddenly what made you valuable yesterday isn’t enough.
That’s the trap.
Survival mode protects the present…while sacrificing the future.
Growth Mindset: The Thriving Skill That Changes Everything
This is where growth mindset matters—not as a motivational poster, but as brain science.
A growth mindset (popularized by psychologist Carol Dweck) is the belief that abilities can be developed through effort, strategies, and feedback—not fixed traits you either have or don’t.
But the deeper benefit is this:
Growth mindset reduces threat.
When you believe you can learn, change feels less like danger and more like development.
Growth mindset shifts the inner narrative from:
* “If I don’t know it, I’m behind.”to
* “If I don’t know it yet, I can learn it.”
That “yet” is not small.
That “yet” is freedom.
Because when the brain feels safe enough to learn, it re-engages the prefrontal cortex—your thriving brain.
And suddenly you can do what survival mode cannot:
* think bigger
* tolerate discomfort
* experiment without panic
* evolve without shame
What I Tell My Students (And I Still Tell Myself)
When I teach, I say this constantly:
What you’re learning today does not mean that tool will work forever.
The world changes too fast for that kind of confidence.
And here’s the paradox:
The earlier you learn this, the less scary change becomes.
Because you stop making it mean:
* you failed
* you’re behind
* you’re not smart
* you missed your chance
Instead, you start treating change as a normal part of staying relevant.
You stop fearing the unknown…and you start fearing stagnation.
Not from panic.
From clarity.
How to Discern: Survival Mode vs Thriving Mode
This is the part that matters most—discernment.
Because the goal is not to “never be in survival mode.”
The goal is to recognize when you are…and stop building your whole life from that place.
Signs you’re in Survival Mode
* You’re avoiding change even though you know you’re outgrowing the situation
* You’re staying because leaving feels too risky
* You feel constantly behind, even when you’re doing well
* You’re overly focused on proving, performing, pleasing
* You’re learning less, not more
* You’re getting paid, but shrinking inside
* You’re “fine”… but you’re not expanding
Signs you’re in Thriving Mode
* You’re making choices aligned with long-term growth
* You’re building skills that will matter in two years, not just today
* You’re thinking in outcomes, not tasks
* You can tolerate discomfort without spiraling
* You’re curious again
* You’re investing in yourself consistently
* You feel stretched… but alive
Thriving isn’t easier.
It’s just honest.
The TAG Collab Takeaway
If you take nothing else from this, take this:
Survival mode isn’t failure.It’s a signal.
A signal that your brain is protecting you.
But protection is not the same as progress.
And long-term success—the kind that makes you resilient, relevant, and genuinely fulfilled—requires a skill most people never build:
the ability to notice what state you’re operating from… and choose differently.
So I’ll ask you again:
Are you surviving… or are you thriving?
Because if you’re surviving, don’t shame yourself.
Just don’t build a whole decade there.
You deserve a future that doesn’t just pay you…
It grows you.
About the Author: Teri Arvesu Gonzalez
Teri Arvesu Gonzalez is a 15-time Emmy® award-winning media executive and the founder of The TAG Collab, a consultancy and platform dedicated to helping mission-driven companies align purpose, brand, and strategy from the inside out.
Formerly the Senior Vice President of Social Impact and Sustainability at TelevisaUnivision, Teri has spent over two decades at the intersection of journalism, civic tech, and corporate social responsibility. A recognized expert in navigating brand resilience and long-term value creation, her work focuses on moving organizations beyond “performative storytelling” into the “Reality Era” of business—where specific, measurable data and operational integrity drive growth.
A third-generation American and veteran News Director, Teri is a frequent speaker on CivicTech, AI in journalism, and the math of win-win leadership. Through The TAG Collab, she provides strategic frameworks that help brands stay relevant to Gen Z and Gen Alpha by prioritizing transparency and “Value Signaling” over traditional marketing buzzwords.
📌 Connect with Teri:
* Podcast: The TAG Collab
* TikTok
This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thetagcollab.substack.com/subscribe