Jackie Chan has long since passed the precipice of a worldwide icon, and the obligatory movie in which famous actors play themselves was bound to come along eventually. But where films like Being John Malkovich (1999)  and The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent (2022) used this meta-plot narrative to tell reflective and, in the case of the former, groundbreaking additions to the medium, the movie where Jackie Chan adopts a poorly CGI-ed panda is far from either of these things.