april of this year (2025) i had my first experience with ayahuasca, tucked away with the trees on the edge of the colombian jungle. after his own ayahuasca journey, sam believ created lawayra retreats to make the wisdom of this sacred medicine accessible to a wider range of people. his vision, presence, and approach is truly a gift to this world. alongside him in this conversation is the at the time head of facilitation, dr. clara porwoll. while i am still in my process of integrating all that i learned through my own journey, and it has not felt right to share my experience yet, i share this conversation with you with trust that it will resonate with those whom it's meant to.if we keep our minds open, the possibilities are limitless.

links:

* sam believ

* the ayahuasca podcast

***dr. clara porwoll - western medicine vs amazonian medicine. lessons after 3400 cups served (the ayahuasca podcast)

* lawayra retreat (colombia)

felt inspired to share, so i did.

this episode i talk about where i’m at creatively, my challenges showing up authentically, and my fears around doing so. i share what i’ve been doing to embody leo season, how it’s empowering me, and how my creative endeavors are affected. lastly, i geek out about debra silverman’s approach to astrology, and what i learned about my personal progressed moon.

mentions:- debra silverman- free progressed moon workshop (debra silverman)

after an 11 month hiatus, the pod is back! i genuinely took the mic in my hand (instead of leaving in its stand), took three deep breaths, closed my eyes, and spoke freely. and damn, it felt ~right~

i didn’t have a plan going into this episode, i only wanted to share my truth about why i haven’t released episodes, what the podcast is to me, and how i plan to courageously move forward with it. i share where my head and heart have been where i hope they’ll lead me.

the takeaway is this:i promise nothing beyond deep, vulnerable conversations around anything that’s on my mind. and i hope you feel safe to explore with me.

*TAY FAV* in this episode, robyn and i dive deep into what it's like to exist as an introspective human. how our experiences and inner thoughts influence how we go through the world, what we believe, and how we behave. i love talking with others who love to look inward, feel deeply, accept imperfections, and work consistently at growing and bettering ourselves, and this conversation checks all the boxes. robyn is vulnerable and real, and in being so, we were able to connect on so many levels. if you're creative, sensitive, and introspective, i think you'll find this episode relatable and inspiring.
SPOILERS: under the bridge

- PLEASE consider sharing or donating to robyn's movie, ultraviolet catastrophe, if it feels right for you:
https://igg.me/at/ultravioletcatastrophe
- find robyn on instagram: @robynlynncouch

key topics:

• robyn’s big 2 - who and how
• spiritual mediums as tools of self discovery
• empathy vs sympathy, emotional vs sensitive
• our journeys in pursuing art
• mental judgments and how we talk to ourselves
• owning who we are without qualifiers
• a deeper look at our judgments and envy
• robyn’s film! ultraviolet catastrophe
• taking control of our own lives / releasing victim mindset
• the voices / words in our head
• manipulation, and holding multiple truths at once
• the journey is eternal - we are healing
• AA and safe spaces
• reframing how we view others’ art

mentions:

• artist’s way - julia cameron
• kati morton
• under the bridge

find me:

- website: *coming soon*
- patreon: authentic AF
- instagram: @authenticaf_pod, @tayrey.k
- tiktok: @tayrey.k

TW: depression

i know it's been a while since i released an episode. i've had a lot of life going on and with that, questions, discoveries, and challenges. join me in this episode as i share a bit about what that's looked like for me, how it's affecting me, and where i hope to go from here. thank you for listening to this episode<3

find me:

- website: *coming soon*
- patreon: authentic AF
- instagram: @authenticaf_pod, @tayrey.k
- tiktok: @tayrey.k

in this episode i talk about circumstances that impacted me in my formative years, and the effects that compounded and continued to play out from there. i reflect on some strengths and obstacles i view as part of my journey, and discuss how my attachment style is ever present in my life, and personality. speaking honestly about some of my talents and different ways to use them feels vulnerable, and also so freeing to share. thanks for listening to this episode <3

find me:

- website: *coming soon*
- patreon: authentic AF
- instagram: @authenticaf_pod, @tayrey.k
- tiktok: @tayrey.k

this kicks off the goods, the juice, the intricacies of the soul within the human body of taylor rey kilpatrick. when we are young, before the environment in which we grow up grasps us in its hands and pushes us to be conditioned to its will, we are pure. we are us, in our most authentic state. and i want to reconnect to that state of existence, to the truer version of myself that existed there. here i dive into what that was like for me - the moments and memories that fill me with euphoria and joy and life. before i told myself who i was supposed to be, i was just me. born into this world to be me, to shine and breathe and share my me-ness with all.

i'm so grateful to be able to share this with you, and in doing so, remind myself of who i truly am. to appreciate my gifts here, my uniqueness. for me, i love to talk, to imagine, to dream. i'm an optimistic, a believer, maybe a psychopath. i'm sensitive, forgiving, creative, and driven by an open heart. i hope this episode gives you better insight into who you're listening to (:

mentions:
- odyssey of the mind
- six levels of higher consciousness

find me:

- website: *coming soon*
- patreon: authentic AF
- instagram: @authenticaf_pod, @tayrey.k
- tiktok: @tayrey.k

a bit of a preview of what i'll be sharing, why, and some things to keep in mind while listening to the episodes that follow, my story, conversations you have with others, and thinking back on your own life. i want to know better who i am, and the best way for me to do that is to be honest about who i've been. i ask you to keep an open mind, to hold space for multiple and conflicting views at once, and to remember that my story is MY story, and that doesn't make it right or wrong. 

a huge thank you to anyone showing up for this, and for anyone showing up for yourself in your own life (: love will change the world.

mentions:

• fairy tale by stephen king

find me:

- website: *coming soon*
- patreon: authentic AF
- instagram: @authenticaf_pod, @tayrey.k
- tiktok: @tayrey.k

to kick off s3 of the pod, i'm sharing with you my origin story -- an exploration of me, my journey of life, lessons i've learned, and what's stuck with me most from my experiences.

being seen, understood, and loved is a core need in my soul. i can't be those things if i don't share myself. this is my invitation to you into my story. welcome (:

find me:

- website: *coming soon*
- patreon: authentic AF
- instagram: @authenticaf_pod, @tayrey.k
- tiktok: @tayrey.k

today i sit down with lisa reams for an honest, natural, self-empowering conversation. she -- like i do -- loves diving deep on why we are the way we are - what drives our behaviors? what about us is needing to be looked at, what is the core emotion we're working around? to look even further at these big questions, lisa has found support and magic with the enneagram. in this episode she gives the scoop on what the enneagram is, and how we can use it to better understand ourselves and learn to thrive in our lives.

• intro (0:00)
• get to know lisa and ice breakers (2:29)
• learning about ourselves (10:30)
• current influences and pleasures (20:19)
• lisa's journey and intro to enneagram (34:37)
• overview of enneatypes (47:36)
• enneagram wings (52:51)
• processing, and directions of growth and stress (58:06)
• continuum three levels of (1:04:12)
• the three subtypes (1:08:14)
• enneagram in real life (1:14:25)
• lisa’s recommendations (1:36:56)
• closing thoughts (1:43:08)
  
  

mentions:
- superfight
- comedy bang bang (spotify)
- goose goose duck
- enneagram institute
- the wisdom of the enneagram by  Don Richard Riso, Russ Hudson
- the road back to you by Ian Morgan Cron and Suzanne Stabile

find lisa:
- ninearrowd
- instagram @ninearrowd

find me:

- website: *coming soon*
- patreon: authentic AF
- instagram: @authenticaf_pod, @tayrey.k
- tiktok: @tayrey.k