Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Come see us on tour! Buy tickets here:

https://www.x1entertainment.com/bttb

"Planning a wedding is a full-time job, it takes so much time. Especially if you're very detailed oriented like me. I could have spent four years planning that wedding and probably still could have used more time," remarks Brooke about wh... wait OMG IT'S BROOKE!!!!

Yes folks it's time for a special post-wedding report episode of Back to the Barre that's been two years in the making! This past week Brooke and Brian finally tied the knot; it was a night to remember. And who better to serve our bitchettes the wedding tea than the new Mrs. Thalman herself!? How much alcohol was needed to keep everyone at bay, and since when do weddings serve shots? What was the best bop on the dance floor?

But most importantly we've reached the epic conclusion to Kelly's Wedding Dress Saga, you won't want to miss it.

Quotes

• “Well a minivan does come in handy, it's like a moving room! I will never have one tho, but I do like yours mom. You say that now. Yeah, wait until you have three babies!" (10:11-10:23 | Christi, Kelly & Brooke)
• “[After doing the math] we were able to decide how many bottles were needed. How many did you alot for your mother and me? Just curious. On the higher end." (14:58-15:09 | Brooke & Christi)
• “I do know that my dress was very scandalous. My boob was falling out, there may be footage we can't use." (28:38-28:46 | Christi)
• “It was the only wedding that I've ever been to in my adult life, this is kind of sad, that I wasn't in trouble the next day. I mean I was in trouble but not for the reasons I'm normally in trouble." (1:00:53-1:01:02 | Christi)

Links

Subscribe to us on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC50aSBAYXH_9yU2YkKyXZ0w 

Subscribe to our Patreon: www.patreon.com/backtothebarre

Thank you to Ashley Jana for allowing us to use Electricity!! Follow her on IG HERE: https://instagram.com/ashleyjanamusic?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

Download Electricity HERE: https://music.apple.com/us/album/electricity/1497482509?i=1497482510

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We're headed on the road in 2026! Buy tickets here:

https://www.x1entertainment.com/bttb

"Stop it right now! Please why didn't we see that on TV!? I want the footage, show me now! I want a Candy Apples spin-off right now!" Well if there's one thing Christi and Dr. Intern Matt would like you to know, it's that we've been robbed of a Candy Apples show that would have been as entertaining as Dance Moms if there was any justice in this world. Oh yes, Dr. Intern Matt has returned! Kelly is out scrambling to wedding prep this week and we've made a house call to the doctor. And you needed any indication how much Bitch #1 and Temu Bitch #2 get along, this two hours only covers half of "Abby's Trash, Cathy's Treasure"!

Cathy is back with a full vengeance and recruits (better read of course as Production forced her to recruit) all bunch of girls and moms that Abby turned away during her search for new ALDC members. The only problem of course is it's yet another Candy Apples group that's been roughly assembled together, haven't danced with one another before and therefore are un-prepared to go up against the ALDC, and are destined to take second anyway so why should Cathy even bother. The new moms don't take too kindly to the situation, but hey they're on TV so they'll stick it out while they can! But when the Candy Apples catch wind of how many dances the ALDC will be running at their next competition, they begin to but heads over why they aren't offered that same options to compete (again it's because you're designed to lose).

Meanwhile the ALDC does have quite a lot of dances in the pipeline. Aside from the group dance (which is based on the Clue board game so strap in for some prime Christi geeking out content), the girls are offered three duets! Kalani and Maddie are poised as the obvious powerhouse team, Nia and Mackenzie are paired to give them a shot at collective redemption in Abby's eyes or something, and finally JoJo and Kendall are paired together for a Freaky Friday dance just so we can keep making fun of JoJo (which is feeling increasingly cruel).

But the big news of the week is Sia dropped the music video for Elastic Heart featuring Maddie and Shia LaBeouf (yikes). And if you think that pairing is controversial now, it was a. pretty big internet controversy back in the day! So it's not shocking that both on camera and behind the scenes it's a big point of contention, especially after Cathy (again being forced by production) talks to TMZ and calls Melissa out for allowing the video to happen. How will Melissa respond? I mean how does she always respond?

Quotes

• “Ok but P.S. if you're going to type my name, whoever wrote the field notes, please spell it correctly! It's Christi with an I." (1:08:46-1:08:54 | Christi)
• “I think Abby looks better in Season 5 than I've ever seen her look. I think Abby looks amazing in Season 5!" (1:19:42-1:19:51 | Christi & Matt)
• “Look, I have a doctorate, but in Dance Moms, not in words. Yes and I'm a doctor, but not in language" (1:36:08-1:36:15 | Christi & Matt)
• “Let's hope they stick to that agreement. It's a pact, they don't stick to pacts." (1:55:16-1:55:21 | Christi & Matt)

Links

Subscribe to us on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC50aSBAYXH_9yU2YkKyXZ0w 

Subscribe to our Patreon: www.patreon.com/backtothebarre

Thank you to Ashley Jana for allowing us to use Electricity!! Follow her on IG HERE: https://instagram.com/ashleyjanamusic?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

Download Electricity HERE: https://music.apple.com/us/album/electricity/1497482509?i=1497482510

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Come see us on tour!!! Tickets are selling FAST. We cant believe it and can't thank you enough. www.x1entertainment.com/BTTB

Hi guys

Welcome to our very first Back to the Barre Mini Episode!

We’re experimenting with something new and fun—an extra bonus mini episode each week to give you a little more Kelly & Christi in your life. This is not replacing our regular episodes at all—just an added bonus to see if you like having a shorter, more casual drop in the feed.

Think of minis as quicker chats, listener questions, hot takes, polls and things we don’t always get to during the main episode.

Want to be part of a future mini?

🎙️ Leave us a question on SpeakPipe: www.speakpipe.com/BackToTheBarre and yours might be featured on an upcoming mini episode.

You can also head over to our Patreon, where we post free questions that you can answer—some of those may end up on minis too! www.patreon.com/backtothebarre

This is brand-new territory for us, so consider this our trial run. Let us know what you think—we’re excited to try something new and give you a little extra Back to the Barre each week

XO

Christi & Kelly

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We're headed on the road in 2026! Buy tickets here:

https://www.x1entertainment.com/bttb

"This was a very franken-bit heavy episode. There were numerous times where I knew Abby did not say that." As Christi notes here there was clearly a lot of editing behind the scenes on this episode, but once you hear some of what Abby had to say in the show notes you won't be too shocked why that is. On Season 5's "Nia's Last Chance", Abby starts to take things too far in her treatment of the girls (shock) and as the title suggests no one is getting the worse end of that stick than Nia.

After getting a win over Cathy the week prior, Abby is in a better than average mood at Pyramid and puts the whole team on the same spot for their hard work... except Maddie who still gets her pre-requisite spot at the top. Though not everyone gets off easy as Abby has the girls critique JoJo as some sort of hazing ritual to finally be accepted onto the team. JoJo fortunately takes it better than expected, but it's hard not to feel like a harbinger of what's to come.

Turning their attention to the upcoming competition in Philadelphia, the moms ask Abby if she can give the girls some more contemporary material to work with, feeling that she's not quite yet lived up to her promise of giving them more challenging choreography to better prepare them for the professional world. Abby responds in kind by giving the team clearly the same lyrical material they're used to, just calling it something else. They'd worry about this more if there clearly wasn't something more pressing to deal with, like Abby's continued obsession with trying to put Holly and Nia in their place for their crime on doing the right thing. Nia is given a solo but is warned she won't be getting anymore if she fails to place.

Holly forms a pact with Jess and Kira to have each other's back when dealing with Abby, which angers Jill for some reason? Jill and Melissa are upset Holly would side with the new moms despite the fact they themselves wouldn't stand up to Abby, and it's clear Jill is quickly morphing into Melissa 2.0. But can you blame Holly when you hear some of the things Abby says about Nia off screen? What might she have said you ask? Well you'll have to tune, it's to unsavory to write out here.

Quotes

• “Let me show you this jacket, you're going to die. It is the ugliest thing you've ever seen. However, it will be fun to wear tonight if I wear it." (02:10-02:15 | Christi)
• “The moms seem to be enjoying deep throating the hot dogs more... OH MY GOD!!! Ok I made that up, though it does say they enjoy them more than the girls. " (49:49-50:03 | Christi & Kelly)
• “Melissa bitterly mentions last time there was a pact with Kelly and Christi... yeah you f**cking broke it!" (1:15:26-1:15:32 | Christi)
• “I hope the kids at the ALDC make a lot of money cause they're going to need it for therapy one day. No we didn't, and yes we need therapy." (2:01:27-2:01:35 | Christi & Kelly)

Links

Subscribe to us on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC50aSBAYXH_9yU2YkKyXZ0w 

Subscribe to our Patreon: www.patreon.com/backtothebarre

Thank you to Ashley Jana for allowing us to use Electricity!! Follow her on IG HERE: https://instagram.com/ashleyjanamusic?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

Download Electricity HERE: https://music.apple.com/us/album/electricity/1497482509?i=1497482510

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We're headed on the road in 2026! Buy tickets here:

https://www.x1entertainment.com/bttb

"The field notes for Candy Apples are unhinged. If you guys have never read the field notes for this episode then buckle up. It is possibly equal or crazier than some of our craziest stuff that has gone on. I don not know why they did not show any of this." And Christi isn't downplaying that either. Off screen an entire war was waged between Lucas' mom Bridget and Cathy, which left our Bitches floored by the sheer lunacy of the situation. While you got a taste of it in the episode proper, there's so much more name calling and subterfuge that it's honestly a little hard to keep track of!

This week the ALDC and Candy Apples will pair off again at Sheer Talent in New Jersey... which of course since Abby has a stake in that competition it seems rather unlikely out the gate the Apples will stand a chance. Cathy is aware of this and enlists Erin Babbs to choreograph for the Candy Apples, hoping it'll not only produce great results but also annoy Abby in the process since she lost to Babbs a little over a month prior. It certainly annoys Abby, but it's going to take Cathy busting out a megaphone to really get her blood boiling (and Production is only too eager to oblige).

Quotes

• “Ugh, Jess is always bad. She's kind of like the new Christi, in that she's always showing up with some ugly shit." (10:33-10:39 | Christi)
• “Oh my gosh, is Abby telling someone to listen to their mother?" (1:20:33-1:20:36 | Kelly)
• “My biggest question tho is I would really like to know where they were holding Vivi hostage? Because having Cathy come without Vivi is a world I don't want to live in." (1:24:56-1:25:08 | Christi)
• “Abby is going to deliver the line that literally is going to light, and I said this last week, every gas lantern in America. So all of you just raise your glasses in a universal toast because you are drinking to what is, not maybe, but definitively the biggest contradiction ever uttered in the history of Dance Moms." (1:34:43-1:35:12 | Christi)

Links

Subscribe to us on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC50aSBAYXH_9yU2YkKyXZ0w 

Subscribe to our Patreon: www.patreon.com/backtothebarre

Thank you to Ashley Jana for allowing us to use Electricity!! Follow her on IG HERE: https://instagram.com/ashleyjanamusic?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

Download Electricity HERE: https://music.apple.com/us/album/electricity/1497482509?i=1497482510

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We're headed on the road in 2026! Buy tickets here:

https://www.x1entertainment.com/bttb

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We're headed on the road in 2026! Buy tickets here:

https://www.x1entertainment.com/bttb

"Let's get into the episode so we can bitch a lot! Yay, everyone wants to hear us bitch!" It's true, we can't get enough of it! And on Season 5's "The Great Divide" it turns out the other moms couldn't get enough of it either. With the ALDC back in Pittsburgh it doesn't take long for things to get heated as the fallout from the pretty disastrous trip to LA begin to pick apart what little group dynamic there was.

Jill is worried about how she's being perceived for siding with Abby during the MattyB shoot. While she did initially support Holly, Jill knows if she crosses Abby it'll only lead to Kendall getting retaliated against and sees her pivot to Team Abby as a natural choice. Of course that doesn't sit right with Holly, who feels not only betrayed but believes Jill and Melissa's kowtowing to Abby sets a bad example for the girls and dooms only Nia to failure when there would have been strength in numbers. But Holly decides it's time she rethink how she views her friendships with the moms, in order to at the very least avoid future heartbreak. This in turn only makes Jill more frustrated with the situation.

Abby is more concerned with the upcoming competition in New Jersey, which starts their teen division at age 12. This would mean the ALDC would have to compete against older dancers, and Abby doesn't think her girls stand a chance. In fact she makes clear that once one of her dancers enters the teen division, she no longer sees them as her student. Despite being an embarrassing admission of guilt in regards to her skillset ,the only person who'll suffer for it is Kalani who now has to sit out the group dance in order for the team to compete in the Junior category. Her consolation prize however is a solo with actually interesting and fresh choreography. Unfortunately Abby doesn't so easily forget when she feels wronged, and Nia in turn is presented with a very stale solo routine and isn't even given the dignity of having Abby pay attention to her rehearsal.

Quotes

• “...or a priest because it was obviously another immaculate reception. Wait what is it? Conception, not reception! I'm from Pittsburgh, the Immaculate Reception is what we care about more." (02:15-02:24 | Christi)
• “I can do anything I put my mind to Christi! I know, you don't give up Kelly. If there's one thing I know it's that you perceiver, especially in the name of alcohol." (04:24-04:33 | Christi & Kelly)
• “Kira attempts to show some appreciation of Holly's actions and gives her kudos for doing it. Huh, as long as Holly's got kudos she doesn't need anyone backing her up!" (1:22:47-1:22:57 | Christi)
• “Kira and Jill both told me at the reunion that they never watched the show before they were on it. Oh, ok and I'm a natural blonde. Get outta here!" (1:34:38-1:34:49 | Christi & Kelly)

Links

Subscribe to us on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC50aSBAYXH_9yU2YkKyXZ0w 

Subscribe to our Patreon: www.patreon.com/backtothebarre

Thank you to Ashley Jana for allowing us to use Electricity!! Follow her on IG HERE: https://instagram.com/ashleyjanamusic?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

Download Electricity HERE: https://music.apple.com/us/album/electricity/1497482509?i=1497482510

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.