"It was the most unhinged 15 minutes I've ever witnessed in my life," recounts Christi in reference to "The Sandwich Incident". But the incident happened entirely off-screen! It's one of Christi's most cherished Dance Moms memories, one she has thought about monthly for over a decade! So on the first half of "Kiss or Get Off the Pot", come for Abby's insistence of making children do things they're uncomfortable with, stay for a classic behind the scenes Abby meltdown.

The Select team is out this week so the production doesn't have to pay them, but Sarah H and Christy stick around to claim the top spot on the Pyramid. The rest of the placements seem arbitrary at best, Abby is mostly upset that the girls cried after coming in second. The moms point out their attitude probably had more to do with their teacher making a separate team to upstage them after they were on a long win streak.

Abby announces they're going to be going head to head once again with Cathy at In10city Dance in Ohio. To spite Cathy she enlists the help of Gino, one of Cathy's former dancers, to perform a duet with Maddie. While the pairing was obviously designed with Maddie, Abby holds auditions for the duet to give the appearance of fairness, but ends up just insulting most of the girls until she arrives at Maddie anyways. Maddie does not like that Abby is insisting she kiss Gino for the performance as it'll be her first kiss, but Abby seems dead set on making it happen for some reason.

The other thing Abby is dead set on is making it clear she was on Dancing with the Stars. Not only does she keep bringing it up, but she even themes the group dance around it!

Quotes

• “Everyone was cracking up that you said these were all the books you read. I lied! I lied!" (01:32-1:43 | Christi & Kelly)
• “That was Kelly's favorite thing about Candy Apples. They would say Candy Apples and Kelly's eyes would light up. She'd go, 'Can we get beef Jerky?!'” (09:59-10:06 | Christi)
• “I'm so disappointed that 2012 Christi didn't say sloppy seconds. I need to go back and tell Abby she was picking up Cathy's sloppy seconds. That was a golden opportunity to use those words." (24:36-24:46 | Christi)
• “The children knew that Abby was crying over the sandwich." (45:34-45:37 | Christi)

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"Alright, so this is going to descend into hell very quickly," remarks Christi as the inevitable confrontation between the moms and the Select team comes to fruition on the second half of "Double the Moms, Double the Trouble". The teams arrive at Sheer Talent and Abby's differing treatment of the two teams becomes more visually apparent as the girls receive their costumes. The Select team is blessed with intricate outfits while, as Holly puts it, the Elite team got stuck with $10 pajamas. But Abby continues to downplay and excuse the circumstances, though is more than happy to celebrate the Elite team playing second fiddle to her new dancers as the Select team takes first.

The moms are content to say congratulations and walk away, but Production is not content to let our moms off the hook (not so long as there is drama to be had). The new moms attempts to stir the pot even manage to set Holly off, which the edit manages to frame as Holly getting mad at Maddie somehow! It's a rough episode as always, but we have a lot more behind the scenes facts that should shed some light on how rough it really was.

Quotes

• “I still can't get over that I got arrested for what I did and they didn't" (07:18-7:24 | Kelly)
• “Why did people get mad at you for that? Who f*****g knows Kell, I get in trouble for everything.” (09:54-09:57 | Christi & Kelly)
• “I'm sitting there thinking Abby would rather have her on the team than me? Was I that bad!?" (24:46-26:53 | Kelly)
• “" (1:08:53-1:08:59 | Christi)

Links

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"I just want to point out we're already 40 minutes in and we're not done with Pyramid. Guys the tea is hot the season." It certainly says something that the first episode of Season 4B is so am packed with things to talk about that we still had to cover this episode over two weeks! But don't fret our little Bitchettes, because we have more behind the scenes to talk about than ever before thanks to the Producer's notes being leaked back in the day. So if you didn't think our tea was hot enough already as is then you haven't seen anything yet. And "Double the Moms,

Double the Trouble" is an episode you'll want the tea for as things quickly heat up with the Select Team.

Christy emerges as an annoying voice of reason amongst the new moms, in that she's right about everything but can't find a way not to be annoying! In the previous competition Abby meddled with the scoring so that Chloe would lose, and only Christy seems to find that odd. The rest of the Select Moms are more concerned Abby hasn't gotten rid of Christy, and Tami insists her daughter is ready to take Sarah H's solo if Abby changes her mind. In turn Christy insists that she and Tami throw hands and a fight ensues. things get messy fairly quickly, but do they get kicked out of the ALDC or get the cops called on them? Of course not! If Abby is consistent about one thing it's being inconsistent with how she applies the the ALDC rules.

Quotes

• “Kelly, could you not file your toenails on the podcast?!" (10:51-10:55 | Christi)
• “Later on in life I become friends with Traci and she is so mad that I called her Frumpelstiltskin on national television!” (24:55-25:02 | Christi)
• “I don't think Sia would have been thrilled having Abby be there on set." (31:03-31:07 | Kelly)
• “Because they had a fist fight the Producers didn't need a fight that day. So we didn't have to work! It was the greatest day of my life!" (1:08:53-1:08:59 | Christi)

Links

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"We could have done Chloe vs. Maddie but we've talked about everything ad nauseam about that rivalry so who wants to sit and listen to us again?" Yes after two reunion episodes we get a ol' clipshow covering material that's already worn out its welcome. So instead of slogging through that we're going to ump ahead to the next episode... which is still kind of a clipshow but it's different enough! Abby takes center stage as she counts down her top 10 ALDC dances, with the full uncut dances featured!

It's a good enough excuse to walk down memory lane, plus plenty of Abby's picks match Christi and Kelly's own. But there are certain selections that will leave you scratching your head, and Abby's reasonings don't always tell the whole story. So join us as we re-examine some of the girl's finest work.

Quotes

• “Well it's a shit day in Pittsburgh, per usual." (01:14-01:17 | Christi)
• “Abby and her staff did work incredibly hard. So for as much as we said it was hard for our kids to learn dances every week, I can't imagine how hard it was for them to choreograph every week.” (16:25-16:36 | Christi)
• “It was such a stupid fight. Such a stupid fight. Weren't they all?" (33:18-33:24 | Christi & Kelly)
• “I have to agree with Abby... maybe the first time ever." (43:11-43:14 | Kelly)

Links

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"What's been the highlight of your life so far, nine year old?!" It's time for yet another reunion episode... it feels like we get more every season! But this time around it's no moms allowed for the first Girl's Only Reunion. Jeff Collins asks the girls a series of questions taken from twitter, though it may not shock you to realize most of them were secretly drafted by production. This episode also marked the final appearances of both Asia and Payton.

We have thoughts on all of these question as well as the sheer absurdity of what didn't make it to air. Plus Vivi makes a appearance this episode, so you know it's going to be a funny one!

Quotes

• “Clara says you like Chloe better and I'm like I don't like anybody better. I like the cats and the dog better. " (21:55-22:00 | Christi)
• “Payton is like everyone has been inured so far. And Chloe is like wel I haven't. Don't worry Chloe, yours is coming.” (37:22-37:27 | Christi)
• “I felt like Asia was told what to say there. Kelly, I think Asia was told to say the entire thing." (41:43-41:49 | Christi & Kelly)
• “Kelly, YOU gave the gay talk to half of the United States and around the world. I know! You are personally responsible for teaching many people that being gay is acceptable. It is!" (1:01:38-1:01:50 | Christi & Kelly)

Links

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“I didn’t really think about that I was going to be brought up,” laments Kelly, who forgot that even though she’s out for the count doesn’t mean she gets out of being the main subject of Season 4’s first reunion. I mean how could Abby possibly turn down a chance to celebrate her getting her way?

Jeff Collins welcomes Abby to the stage and they cover what a hard time it’s been for Abby with the loss of her mother, making Abby the last surviving member of her family. She espouses about the need to be able to cry and work through your feeling when you’re dealing with loss, though this is not a courtesy she often extends to others. The topic switches to the slap heard around the world, and Abby exclaims that while she can be harsh she didn’t deserve to be treated like that.

Enter Christ, who points out that Abby was being aggressive and instigated the fight. While Abby takes offense to the assertion, Jeff believes the situation has brought the moms together and Christi herself seems somewhat more emboldened than she was prior. Though as Christi notes, that’s not really the case at all, they’re just more targets for Abby to refocus her energy on.

Jeff attempts to bring Melissa out to challenge Christi on her assertions that Maddie lied about the solo incident, but Christi snaps and walks off stage. She is determined not to be set up to fail alone and brings in the rest of the moms as back up. Will the moms be able to patch up some of their differences… I mean is Santa real?! Also Cathy is here for good measure, because what would a reunion be without a little candy apple treat!

Quotes

• “I can remember standing in my closet in my house in Pittsburgh having a full on panic attack, knowing I was packing to go to the reunion." (13:29-13:40 | Christi)
• “Do you have Buddy’s ashes? Yes… well I don’t. Randy got those in the divorce to. He got everything! Even got the dog’s ashes!” (15:59-16:08 | Christi)
• “I’m wondering if people’s tunes changed a little bit, meaning the moms, because of the backlash of the fans from them not standing up for you." (24:58-25:09 | Christi)
• “The minute someone pushes back with a point, she’s like I’ll just punish your kid then!" (55:47-55:50 | Christi)

Links

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Thank you to Ashley Jana for allowing us to use Electricity!! Follow her on IG HERE: https://instagram.com/ashleyjanamusic?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

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Get Season Two of Pillow Talk HERE: 

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"Consistently across the board these are becoming increasingly hard for me to watch," says Christi for what might be the millionth time since Kelly departed the show, but she's also nothing if consistent! And as the second half of "Presenting My New Team" begins the new moms and the OG's are already at each other's throats, or at the very least Christy is making enemies with just about everyone including her fellow new recruits. The only solace the team gets from Christy is going to a "bar" where she won't go due to the alcohol. However Kira and Tracey are unable to reconcile their differences and the meeting ends in tears. Meanwhile Melissa is trying to play both sides, pledging loyalty to the OG's while still not willing to spy on the Elite team for them.

Competition day arrives and the ALDC dances are all over the place. Kendall and Kalani's "Rule the World" lands with a thud while Ava and Sarah R's "Birds of a Feather Flock Together" gets a mild reception. Better off are Kamryn and Chloe's solos which perform exceptionally well. Chloe's "Lucky Star" remains a favorite, showcasing how much work she put in to prove herself in a team where she's being increasingly singled out as a target. However, behind the scenes Abby was working to once again pull the spotlight off a Chloe. On camera Abbys sabotage is clearly visible in the team's dueling group dances. Not only does the Elite team get the benefit of having lyrical dance, but the OG's are forced to dance in boots!

Oh and if that wasn't enough, Cathy joins the fray. Why is she present when her team isn't performing? Because why not!

Quotes

• “I'm anxious to see Holly come out of her shell a little bit. Has she peed in the shower yet? No!" (2:40-2:46 | Christi & Kelly)
• “Their kids very rarely got treated as poorly as our kids.” (18:54-18:58 | Christi)
• “You know I'm noticing a pattern here. Melissa doesn't get along with Christis." (21:16-21:21 | Christi)
• “I think the people she picked aren't the best. Like if you could pick the best of anybody in the world, I don't know where she came up with these people." (27:27-27:35 | Kelly)

Links

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Thank you to Ashley Jana for allowing us to use Electricity!! Follow her on IG HERE: https://instagram.com/ashleyjanamusic?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

Download Electricity HERE: https://music.apple.com/us/album/electricity/1497482509?i=1497482510

Follow Christi on IG: www.instagram.com/christilukasiak

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Get Season Two of Pillow Talk HERE: 

https://pillowtalkpod.com

"Who let me talk on television!?" ponders Christi. Though now with a whole new Elite Team of moms she certainly won't have to worry about saying the worst possible thing this week! Yes Abby has finally assembled her Junior Elite Team including: Sarah Hunt and mom Christy, Ava Cota and mom Jeanette, Jade Cloud and mom Loree, Sarah Reasons and mom Tracey, Tealynn (Tea) Adamson and mom Tami, and Kamryn Beck and mom Jodi. Joining them will be Maddie, because Abby is determined for the new team to dominate and Maddie can't lose.

Tensions flare up quickly, though in an unlikely turn of events it's Kalani who comes out against the moms. As it turns out she has some history with Tracy and Sarah, referring to them as Arizona trash. Before things get too out of hand, Abby begins to pair off the new girls with the OG girls. This way each division gets two ALDC competitors and she can force the girls to compete against one another. The pairs are Chloe/Kamryn, Ava/Kendall, Nia/Sarah R, Tea+Sarah H/Mackenzie, and Kalani/Jade.

With a competition in Ohio just around the corner it's time to get all the numbers in shape. But will the new moms manage to get along while the girls are hard at work? Well if you're Christy (with a Y) you can always call on the Lord to rebuke those moms you don't get along with. As Holly points out, Abby's perfect team is already not quite working.

Quotes

• “Are you drinking anything interesting? Tea with MiraLAX in it... because I'm supposed to go to the bathroom. That's my cocktail for the day! How far we have fallen Kell." (13:03-13:20 | Christi & Kelly)
• “Absolutely, she wanted to get rid of our girls. But I think she would have rather just replaced them than have a second team.” (20:51-20:056 | Christi)
• “If she has that bad of posture and she needs to be in a back brace, why did you pick her for the select team?" (50:16-50:22 | Kelly)
• “This is what I don't like when they bring new people in. Everybody is trying really hard to like start controversy. And there's no substance to it." (1:00:38-1:00:49 | Christi)

Links

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Thank you to Ashley Jana for allowing us to use Electricity!! Follow her on IG HERE: https://instagram.com/ashleyjanamusic?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

Download Electricity HERE: https://music.apple.com/us/album/electricity/1497482509?i=1497482510

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Get Season Two of Pillow Talk HERE: 

https://pillowtalkpod.com

(Apologies little Bitchettes for the sound quality this week, working out some bugs!)

"This is the 100th episode of Dance Moms. So if you're drinking, cheers to that!" and for Christi that's the first of many drinks on this week's episode as Abby's shenanigans results in another off-screen call to the attorney. But it's a rough week all around as not only does the ALDC have the threat of the incoming select team, not only are they competing against Studio Larkin who they're unlikely to best, but unfortunately this was the weak that Mrs. Miller passed away.

Things get off to a rocky start during pyramid, which sees Nia slotted at the bottom for reasons Abby appears to make-up entirely. This doesn't sit well with Holly who continues to feel they're becoming Abby's replacement for the Hylands. Maddie also takes the top spot despite not performing as well as Chloe did last week. Not to be outdone in her Chloe hate however, Abby states that Chloe won't be joining the filming of Mackenzie's music video this week to practice on her solo. Except Chloe was there at the behest of the production, but Abby caused a scene that left Chloe in tears. Chloe didn't even get to practice her solo (which was also clearly meant to be a Paige solo), adding insult to injury.

Melissa is also starting to feel the strain of the situation during the music video shoot, which just so happens to take place at the Ziegler household. Joining for the shoot are the ALDC Elite Competition Team and Melissa quickly becomes annoyed with Elite Mom Christy "with a Y". Their resulting spat ends with Melissa kicking the mom out, but what really happened?

Quotes

• “Ok so Kell, I hate this episode. I don't cause I'm not on it." (09:37-09:41 | Christi & Kelly)
• “I'm going to give Abby a little bit of grace here. I know, hold on.” (11:59-12:03 | Christi)
• “Holly is not gonna look like an asshole fighting with Abby the week her mom dies!" (41:00-41:04 | Christi)
• “The moment Melissa fought with Chrysty at her house, she signed her name on the dotted line that they were going to be on the select team." (45:20-45:29 | Christi)

Links

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Thank you to Ashley Jana for allowing us to use Electricity!! Follow her on IG HERE: https://instagram.com/ashleyjanamusic?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

Download Electricity HERE: https://music.apple.com/us/album/electricity/1497482509?i=1497482510

Follow Christi on IG: www.instagram.com/christilukasiak

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Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Get Season Two of Pillow Talk HERE: 

https://pillowtalkpod.com

"Abby warns everybody that she might not be at the competition this weekend. Oh don't threaten me with a good time." Yes this week the ALDC gets a little vacation away from Abby, though it isn't under the best circumstances. Mrs. Miller's health is quickly declining and Abby needs to travel out to care for her mother in her final days. Before she heads out, however, she begins casting ALDC members for Mackenzie's music video. Of course not all is at it seems as the episode's edit leaves out the behind the scenes drama that Christi recalls truly pissing her off.

In another fun turn of events, Abby removes Nia from the group dance. The reason? According to Abby there are still not enough costumes for the whole group because of Kelly, so one girl has to go! Outside of being an unlikely story, Holly is mad that Nia is being sidelined again. Abby argues it'll give Nia time to focus on her solo. Holly feels singled out and claims she isn't receiving support from the other moms, which leaves Christi a little confused.

When the girls get to Ohio for competition, they find that with Abby not around the whole ordeal is a lot easier and perform quite well. The only drawback is their group performance of Bollywood and Vine is incredibly executed but fairly problematic. But will it be enough to get the ALDC their 13th straight victory?

Quotes

• “I was cracking up that you texted me and were like this episode sucks. Kelly, every episode of Dance Moms sucks." (08:24-08:30 | Christi)
• “She's talking about winning 13 in a row. What do you need a new team for? You have winners you weirdo.” (20:06-20:12 | Christi)
• “That was probably the last time Abby was even remotely nice to Chloe?" (23:47-23:51 | Christi)
• “You've been gone, what? Since episode seven? This is episode 14? In seven episodes I think four or five of them have been awful for me." (1:00:21-1:00:28 | Christi)

Links

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Thank you to Ashley Jana for allowing us to use Electricity!! Follow her on IG HERE: https://instagram.com/ashleyjanamusic?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

Download Electricity HERE: https://music.apple.com/us/album/electricity/1497482509?i=1497482510

Follow Christi on IG: www.instagram.com/christilukasiak

Follow Kelly on IG: www.instagram.com/kellylhyland

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