This week on Cannon Crüe, Granit and Patrick break down Charleston Battery’s road win in Pittsburgh—our first since 2018. We cover:

• Waves, storms, and the unfortunate postponement of Surfers Healing 🌊
• The rotation puzzle: who sat, who stepped up, and what it means for the playoff push
• Joey’s drop, Arturo’s redemption, and why Aaron Malloy might be the drywall holding up our entire soccer house 🏠
• Referees who couldn’t spot an offside (not “offsides”!) if it bit them
• The glorious forehead of Rubio Rubin
• Patrick beams in from a shaky Wi-Fi connection in a faraway land, which adds to the chaos and the comedy. But despite the tech hiccups, we pull together a proper post-mortem of the match, and even manage to make a few decent coaching points that Ben probably stole from us.

Bonus at the End

Stick around after the outro music for a little “behind-the-pod” moment: Patrick and I trying—and failing—to figure out a tech issue mid-recording. It’s clunky, it’s awkward, and it’s undeniable proof that while we may know our soccer, we are absolute amateurs when it comes to, well… everything else.