The existentialist philosopher Martin Heidegger suggests the antidote to other-ing is being-with.  For me being-with has two interrelated aspects: discovering more of my own inner being to offer to the other and by really listening to the other. The idea is that as I go inside  myself to reflect on who I am, why I am, what I desire, and why do I act as I do – this self-reflection can open in me a space to receive others who are struggling with the very same issues.