Somewhere in Florida… inside of a packed coffee shop, an old man faced down a cashier making minimum wage. “Now listen here missy!” The old man raved, “ I don’t care about what time it is, i’m a damn senior and I want my coffee at the damn senior rate! I—” With the mans mouth open and poised to continue, he abruptly stopped speaking and his face turned from red-fury to white-shock, for a besuited young man in dark glasses had stepped up behind him. The suited man leaned in and whispered something into the old man's ear, after which he handed him a white slip of paper before leaving. “S.O.S” the paper read, and without another word to the cashier, the old man left the coffee shop with trembling hands.

Somewhere in an assisted living facility...two old men were sitting in rocking chairs. They were covered in crocheted blankets, and yelling at the game show rerun being broadcasted on the television set. They each looked up when the nurse came into the room carrying their two trays of food (grits and orange juice), and after they had each paid their daily “compliments” to the nurse about her comely figure (and finished waxing on about what they would do if they were, “thirty years younger'') the pair surveyed their food trays to find one slip of paper sticking out underneath each glass of orange juice. “S.O.S” the notes read. The two men looked at each other with wide-eyed and then nodded.

Somewhere in a warehouse... a grouping of old men —S.O.S papers in hand— gathered, each exhibiting various signs of old age. They spoke amongst themselves for a time, as for many of them it’s been years —decades even, since they’ve last seen each other, no not since they were collective members of “that” gang, the one that went by the name of...—the sound of a VHS tape being slid into action cut short the din of reminiscence and good-humor, and the decrepit men —all business now— crowded around the tube television in the center of the room. Soon their old pal Joe Biden appeared on screen to some cheers. Good old pre-recorded Uncle Joe welcomed the gathered men and reminded them of his run for president. “But I can’t do it alone—” Joe said, “the Barac —uh, Bah, uh...Bide —Bernie Bros are slandering me online. This is crucial, I need this, I need you…” Joe stumbled through the rest of his address, explaining that the online Bernie Bros were “attacking” him on the internet, and that he needed an online army of his own to protect his integrity, and that he couldn’t think of a better rogues gallery for the job than the men he gathered today, the ones feared in times past as the blood curdling, take-no-prisoners collective known as, “The Boost-Up Boys.” It was up to them, Joe insisted, to unite and put the, “brainwashed Commie striplings” in their place. “Should you accept…”, Joe concluded, “please retrieve the America Online 30-day trial compact records —er, uh, disks taped to the bottom of you chairs. You’re gonna need those to use the iPad for the online. Ask your —help, uh, get your grandkids for help, to help you with this. Thank you my friends, and godspeed....”

Topics on today’s episode include: Tech Talk, Let Your Heroes Suck, and Biden Bros!

VOD link for this episode:https://www.twitch.tv/videos/543626151

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