This week on Pausing Democracy 🍸, Jessica is exhausted (possibly from perimenopause, possibly from accidentally waxing off part of her eyelid), but we are still finding the energy to rage-sip through another week of American chaos.

Trump fired the head of the Bureau of Labor Statistics because the jobs report didn’t vibe with his vibes, and then wheeled out a kindergarten-level bar graph with “new data” presented by none other than Project 2025’s Stephen Moore. Meanwhile, JD Vance’s hush-hush cabinet meeting may or may not have been canceled, and Trump’s threatening to seize D.C. with the military.

Over in Dogeland, “Big Balls” (yes, that’s a real guy) got attacked trying to help a woman, South Park returned to tear into authoritarianism, and Texas Republicans are so committed to gerrymandering they’re threatening to jail their own colleagues to do it.

Also: Jeanine Pirro is now U.S. Attorney for D.C., the DOJ mysteriously deleted parts of the Constitution from their site, NASA wants nukes on the moon, and Ghislaine Maxwell swears she never saw Trump do anything “inappropriate” (sure, lady).

Oh, and aliens might be here by November. Cheers!