Today is the Black_Girls_With_Boundaries Podcasts 1 year anniversary and also the 2 year anniversary of my sobriety from alcohol. My discussion about boundaries started a few years ago as I navigated my survival from a toxic marriage, divorce, and the continuous battle of coparenting with a two time diagnosed narcissist.

Through my healing process I discovered how my own childhood traumas played a huge part in attracting such toxic and manipulative behaviors from others into my life. 

Narcissists are notoriously known for overstepping boundaries. They seek empaths who have little or no boundaries at all.

That was me...I had none, didn't know anything about them, didn't know how to set them in order to even stand on them.

It took almost 25 years for me to figure out that this was my issue. Once I figured it out, I slowly allowed that mask that I was wearing so tightly to slide off.

My soul would no longer allow me to cover up all that had gone on. I was now able to start doing the hard work on me and for me. Most importantly, I was able to finally start talking about it.

20+ years of toxicity wore heavy on my mental, emotional, and physical health. There were moments where I made unhealthy choices in the attempt to run from all of this craziness and the pain of trying to be super mom and a super wife through all of it...there is nothing super in that at all.

Today in this episode I open up a bit more on why  Black_Girls_With_Boundaries is so passionate for me. It was my only way out.

The relationship between having no boundaries to having very little boundaries and creating unnecessary struggle is real. We hear all the time how beneficial boundaries are to living peacefully and sound yet many don't talk about the unnecessary struggles created in ones life when you don't know how to set and hold firm to them or when you have them and back track. This episode discusses how struggle can show up in your life when boundaries fall to the waist side.

Welcome back ladies. As yall know we carry a lot of bags and wear a lot of hats. As we go theough life them bags add uonand get heavier and we have to set our boundaries ao that we can lighten our loads. This episode is broken up in segments because it was the most talked about in season one and had the most plays, the .ost inbox conversations and more.

Like I always say, thank you for tuning and and I appreciate you to the fullest. Each season will continue to grow with the love of you all.

Welcome back ladies. As yall know we carry a lot of bags and wear a lot of hats. As we go theough life them bags add uonand get heavier and we have to set our boundaries ao that we can lighten our loads. This episode is broken up in segments because it was the most talked about in season one and had the most plays, the .ost inbox conversations and more.

Like I always say, thank you for tuning and and I appreciate you to the fullest. Each season will continue to grow with the love of you all.

Welcome back ladies. As yall know we carry a lot of bags and wear a lot of hats. As we go theough life them bags add uonand get heavier and we have to set our boundaries ao that we can lighten our loads. This episode is broken up in segments because it was the most talked about in season one and had the most plays, the .ost inbox conversations and more.

Like I always say, thank you for tuning and and I appreciate you to the fullest. Each season will continue to grow with the love of you all.

Welcome back ladies. As yall know we carry a lot of bags and wear a lot of hats. As we go theough life them bags add uonand get heavier and we have to set our boundaries ao that we can lighten our loads. This episode is broken up in segments because it was the most talked about in season one and had the most plays, the .ost inbox conversations and more.

Like I always say, thank you for tuning and and I appreciate you to the fullest. Each season will continue to grow with the love of you all.

We all know a Bag Lady is a woman who has collected so much emotional baggage over time. Wherever she is, so are those bags. This happens when woman take on other people's emotional or physical burdens and responsibilities.

Black women who lack Boundaries often do this and don't even realize it...they carry other people's baggage and continueto add more bags as time goes. Being Codependent and being a people pleaser just to avoid conflict, rejection, or judgement will keep you stuck sis!

It's time to set Boundaries and let that baggage go. Time to lighten your load sis!

So what do I mean ladies when I say Stay in your Lane. It simply means mind your business. It is a metaphor in which  driving is used as an example. For your own safety as well as others, you have to stay in your lane sis....same goes for boundaries.

With Boundaries, we have to set them, stand firm on them, then stay in our lane. Veering out of our lanes can defeat the whole purpose of even having Boundaries and two things will definitely have us stepping out of our lanes....one is comparison and the other is justification. Black Girls setting boundaries is us setting limits to our emotional, mental, and physical capacity. Staying in your lane sis is going to help you prioritize yourself,  your boundaries, & your well-being.

Sis, when it comes to a Black Girls With Boundaries, What We NOT GON DO is play into these myths and stereotypes about Black Girls and Women when we have, display, and communicate clearly & Healthy Boundaries. We are not what they characterize us to be. We also not going to be two stepping around any of the negative vibes, comments, or push back that we get...we will address them assertively and keep protecting our peace by continuing to set, implement, and hold firm to our boundaries. Keep loving ourselves and setting the tone on how others love us as well

Boundaries are a necessity in life whichever way we look at it. Setting and implementing clear and healthy boundaries as a Black Woman is not a game...

Although it may be a game changer for some, once you have healthy ones in place..... setting boundaries to protect your peace and holding firm to them is not be played with.