Them city boys drink that high-falutin' soda, here in the country we drink pop!  Lantz's ex co-worker is constantly running into bicyclists.  Also, the epidemic of bears is ruining this country, and we as a nation need to murder tons of animals and big game in Africa to keep us safe, and show everyone we have enormous wangs.  Maybe we just need to spend 30 days with bears to get to know them better.  Set that up Morgan Spurlock.