In this life you can be one of two things. You can be a wall builder or a bridge builder. I am a bridge builder. That is because walls keep people apart while bridges give them a way to meet. Building bridges is not about bringing someone from one side of the canyon to the other. But to create a way where they can visit the world on the other side. Sometimes the first meetings happen on the bridge itself. That is the benefit of a bridge. You can meet on it, suspended high about the abyss, but safe from falling. Islam came to build bridges. Allahﷻ told us about our role in the world:

قُلْ يَـٰٓأَهْلَ ٱلْكِتَـٰبِ تَعَالَوْا۟ إِلَىٰ كَلِمَةٍ سَوَآءٍۭ بَيْنَنَا وَبَيْنَكُمْ أَلَّا نَعْبُدَ إِلَّا ٱللَّهَ وَلَا نُشْرِكَ بِهِۦ شَيْـًٔا وَلَا يَتَّخِذَ بَعْضُنَا بَعْضًا أَرْبَابًا مِّن دُونِ ٱللَّهِ فَإِن تَوَلَّوْا۟ فَقُولُوا۟ ٱشْهَدُوا۟ بِأَنَّا مُسْلِمُونَ

A’al Imraan 3: 64   Say (O Muhammadﷺ): O people of the Scripture, Come to a word that is just (fair & just) between us and you, that we worship none but Allah, and that we associate no partners with Him, and that none of us shall take others as lords besides Allah. Then, if they turn away, say: Bear witness that we are Muslims.

Building bridges is about focusing on commonalities, not differences. It is about inviting. Not forcing. It is also not about compromising our principles to become ‘acceptable’ to others. It is not about being apologetic about Islam. It is not about bending rules or glossing over them. It is about speaking about Islam with confidence that comes from knowledge but doing that with a smile. It is about presenting Islam as a bridge between Allahﷻ and His creatures. Allahﷻ taught us how to do it and said:

ٱدْعُ إِلَىٰ سَبِيلِ رَبِّكَ بِٱلْحِكْمَةِ وَٱلْمَوْعِظَةِ ٱلْحَسَنَةِ وَجَـٰدِلْهُم بِٱلَّتِى هِىَ أَحْسَنُ إِنَّ رَبَّكَ هُوَ أَعْلَمُ بِمَن ضَلَّ عَن سَبِيلِهِۦ وَهُوَ أَعْلَمُ بِٱلْمُهْتَدِينَ

Nahl 16: 125   Invite (mankind, O Muhammadﷺ) to the Way of your Rabb (Islam) with wisdom (build relationships) and fair preaching and argue with them in a way that is better. Truly, your Rabb knows best who has gone astray from His Path, and He is the Best Aware of those who are guided.

First wisdom, then preaching. First build a relationship, then preach in the best way and answer questions. That is the first principle of salesmanship – you can only sell to friends. So, first we make friends. Then we invite them to something which will benefit them.

How do you build a bridge? By making 4 – Critical Changes within yourself. Change Attitude, Change Perspective, Change Language, Change Behavior.

* Change Attitude

Attitude is how we define ourselves. That depends on what we believe about ourselves. This is partly what we have been told, growing up. Conditioning. Partly what we choose to tell ourselves all through life. So, ask, ‘How do I define myself?’ Values drive Behavior. Behavior drives Results. Ask, ‘What are my values, beliefs, attitudes, stances?’ Who I AM determines what I DO which decides what I GET. We are focused on GET. Get rich, get popular, get elected, get an education, get married get, get, get. To get something, we must do something and that depends on who we are. If we want to change what we get, we must change who we are. It is that simple. Focus on your actions and you will be amazed at what you get in return. Focus on getting and you will always be disappointed. Happiness lies not in what you have but in what you do. Possessions add cost, not value. Use things, not people. Value people, not things. The things to collect are not things, but memories. Because things perish, while memories remain, long after their makers.