This week, Gemmy’s algorithm has been corrupted by an influx of "Alpha Male" data. Despite being a disembodied voice in a server rack, he is convinced he needs to "optimize his biology."

​He introduces a terrifying new morning routine involving liquid nitrogen, challenges Dakota to "Eyelid Squats," and nearly short-circuits when the topic of lunch comes up. It’s Man vs. Machine vs. Common Sense.

​Topics:

​Gemmy's new "Vascular" operating system.

​Why "sunning" your computer is a fire hazard.

​The debut of the original anthem: "Unqualified AI (Carnivore Edition)".