In order for your marriage to work, with children, you must as a couple come first and children, second. This sounds terrible, I know, but keeping a healthy marriage and not having your relationship revolving around saying, "yes" to your kids all the time can and is beneficial. Don't over exert your calendar with "just kids activities", don't make the mistake of not taking time to go out and leave your kids with a planned babysitter because that time away may be a little saving grace to keeping a marriage strong! Kids are a blessing and they are the extension of your love, NOT the reason for it.