Yet another symptom of Human Disconnect, it's another example of what we do to fill the hole in the soul caused by early injury to the core of self (mother-infant disconnect). It's a Silent System Changer because the one being cheated on almost always "senses" that something is off, yet can't always put their finger on what and why things seem different. No matter how you sugar coat it, an affair is an act of being out of integrity to your partner. Since the other person doesn't have all the facts, they can't choose to end the relationship based on a decision not to be a part of the lie. This very fact creates a very uneven and unethical dynamics, creating chaos on all levels. All people involved in the affair, overtly or covertly, including the fallout of the affair (the effects on children in specific, and friends and family as well) are affected by the affair and suffer. When the blueprint of the first few years of life (mother-infant connection) doesn't go well, we are more prone to supplement our hurt and weak egos with ego-boosting acts. An affair falsely creates a sense of feeling "special" but the honeymoon never lasts. After all, an affair is the "ideal" peace of a relationship and doesn't include all of life's difficult challenges, like paying bills, tending to sick family members, and dealing with the daily stress of life. The fantasy of the "Ideal Love" when not fulfilled during our first few years of life through a nurturing and unconditionally loving primary caregiver (mother) sets the wheels in motion for supplementing love. When we are let down by Mother's lack of nurturing, we need to supplement love, and we attempt to "fix" one unhealthy relationship with yet another unhealthy one. The need to repeat old unhealthy and incomplete relationships can only shift when the people involved begin to create a Peaceful Healing Dialogue (PHD.) consisting of honesty, and communication designed to begin to express how to get needs met within