Forgiveness in Families- None of us "does" family perfectly. We sometimes say and do things that offend loved ones. All of us are guilty of "sins" of commission or omission toward those we care about. Forgiveness is an essential part of strong, healthy relationships.

 

Judeo-Christian beliefs teach that nobody is exempt from forgiveness; we should forgive all wrongs that have been done to us, regardless of their severity. The Family: A Proclamation to the World (¶ 7) singles out forgiveness as an essential feature of successful marriages and families. Once thought to be exclusively a religious doctrine, the notion of forgiveness has rapidly movedp beyond religious borders into mainstream society.

 

One definition of forgiveness is the ability to release the mind and the heart from all past hurts and failures, all sense of guilt and loss. Forgiveness enables us to overcome anger and feelings of resentment or a desire to punish or get even with someone who has crossed us. Forgiving involves changing your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors in relationship to the offender. Bad feelings and judgment toward the offender are reduced, not because they don't "deserve" that treatment, but because we willingly view the offender with compassion, benevolence, and love.

Guest 1 on the line: Dumisani Dladla - a qualified trauma and addiction counsellor